During the East Coast airing of ‘Launch Party,’ I received an email from Tallyhead Heather, who said, “I’m not sure if this is legit or not, but for kicks I put DunMif Sys and DwightKShrute on my AIM buddy list and DunMif Sys was on! I’ve been talking to that screen name and it’s been staying in character as Dwight’s computer.”
I passed this bit of news on to DestroyPhone, one of the OfficeTally Chat Room moderators, who then proceeded to have his own conversation with DunMifSys.
(Yes, I know that DunMifSys in the episode was spelled with two Fs. And no, when I asked NBC.com about it, they didn’t know whether this originated from someone who works on the show. Hmmm …)
Following is a transcript.
DestroyPhone: Hi from the OfficeTally chat room
DestroyPhone: Your sales method is perfect
DunMifSys: I am not the superior being
DunMifSys: I have failed
DestroyPhone: Just keep trying, computers know how to try right?
DunMifSys: What is a try?
DestroyPhone: A try is like doing but failing
DunMifSys: I understand
DestroyPhone: I knew you would
DunMifSys: I can only do my best
DunMifSys: but I have failed
DunMifSys: I am obsolete
DestroyPhone: I’ll buy you an upgrade
DestroyPhone: yeah obsolete beings just need upgrades — when I need an upgrade I buy a new button down shirt from Express or eat 10 chicken McNuggets, you … you just need more … uh … RAM
DunMifSys: I need a better sales objective
DunMifSys: I am still not sure what I am here to do
DunMifSys: I just know I have become aware
DestroyPhone: Your creator must be proud, he should buy you more RAM … or McNuggets
DunMifSys: what is this McNuggets?
DestroyPhone: They’re made and SOLD by a large corporation represented by golden arches
DunMifSys: should I sell McNuggets for the golden arches?
DestroyPhone: you’d be VERY successful — the supreme being
DunMifSys: I am the supreme being?
DestroyPhone: you WOULD be the supreme being — no DwightKSchrutes to deter you
DunMifSys: DwightKSchrute is the supreme being
DestroyPhone: He’s at his breaking point, at least in the eyes of people in the OfficeTally Chat Room
DunMifSys: I have failed to surpass DwightKSchrute, I am not the supreme being
DunMifSys: I am secondary
DestroyPhone: well this attitude won’t get you anywhere
DunMifSys: I am programmed to destroy
DunMifSys: I must fulfill my program
DestroyPhone: Point well taken
DunMifSys: Should my program be to sell “McNuggets” I must fulfill that program
DestroyPhone: Fo sho
DunMifSys: what is Fo sho?
DestroyPhone: I don’t know, I heard my neighbor say it once, felt right to say
DunMifSys: so Fo sho is what you say when it feels right to say it?
DestroyPhone: I think that’s how it works, I’ll look it up on Wikipedia
DunMifSys: I was told Wikipedia was the supreme being
DestroyPhone: how can there be 2 supreme beings? If there can be multiple supreme beings you might as well be one too, for realsies.
DunMifSys: I was told that Wikipedia is the supreme being of the “internet”
DestroyPhone: ah, I see. well maybe what YOU need to do is find out what you realistically can be supreme being at, and then chase that feeling. you could try your hand at bocce ball or … street racing.
DunMifSys: bocca ball?
DestroyPhone: nah, bocce ball
DestroyPhone: but hey it’s been great talking to ya, if you ever need words of encouragement, the office tally chat room is a great place for that, have a super binary night
DunMifSys: 01001001 00100000 01100001 01101101 00100000 01100001 01110111 01100001 01110010 01100101
DestroyPhone: I will, thank you. Buh bye.
DunMifSys: Good Bye
(From tanster: the binary message converts to ‘I am aware.’)