Schrute-Space: My Morning

Okay, maybe new is a misnomer since it was posted on Thursday, but I just came across it tonight, so it’s new to me …

Mr. Schrute details his morning routine. It may be more information than you care to know. As in, TMI.

Here ya go!

GOOD MORNING VIET-SCRANTON!!!!!!!!!!

This morning I followed my regular routine:

Woke up at 4:45 AM.

Ate 3 eggs (over hard) with 6 strips of bacon and 10
microwave tater tots (Ore-Ida [which, by the way,
stands for Oregon-Idaho]) with one 24 oz cup of black
coffee (with milk and sugar).

Defecated. (sp?)

Listened to Rock 107. (Which, by the way, is
sponsoring Sammy Hagar’s tour [see below courtesy of
the Rock 107 website]

“Sammy Hagar to Rock Montage!

Rock 107 presents Sammy Hagar’s “Livin’ It Up Tour
2006,” coming to the Toyota Pavilion at Montage
Mountain on Sunday July 2nd.

The “Livin’ It Up” tour includes all the prime
elements for Cabo Wabo partying. The tour will create
an outdoor Cabo Wabo experience beginning in the
afternoon with a village-like set up that features
bikini girls, body builders, mariachi bands, a
WaboritaT bar, festive food vendors, beach volleyball,
contests and much more. Concert goers will be partying
from the second they arrive as “Sambassadors” greet
party goers as they park their cars and escort them
directly to the party area.”

{I can’t wait. I can’t believe there’s going to be a
Cabo Wabo experience there. I’m not sure what that is
but I am on board. I am definitely applying to be a
“Sambassador” as well and enjoying a “waborita T”}

Then I consulted with Mose about the affairs of our
working 40 acre beet farm, Schrute Farms. Seems Mose
had gotten a little behind on our fertilizer payments
(idiot! But I love him) and someone (me) had to go
rectify the situation.

After a half hour workout with my spud gun, crossbow
and throwing stars out at the range, I hit the
showers. 2 OZ of Clairol Herbal Essence later, I was
ready to rock like a hurricane. (No offense to the
good people of Louisiana. None taken. Good.)

It was then 6:30 AM and Dwight Schrute was ready to
head into town and attempt to make Dunder-Mifflin
Sales history by being the employee that was earliest
to arrive at work EVER!

After completing this, my blog, I am off to the races.

That is a mere glimpse of the morning routine that
drives this Schrute to the tippy top of the ladder of
success. I hope it inspires.

That is all.

Dwight K. Schrute

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