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Writer: Charlie Grandy, Director: Jennifer Celotta
Summary (NBC): After the office gets robbed, Michael decides to hold an auction to raise money for all the items lost. Michael helps Pam get a part time job at corporate so she can afford to go to art school.
The Office Crime Aid extras
Writer Charlie Grandy answers fan questions in the Crime Aid Q&A.
The Office Crime Aid rating
In a poll conducted Oct. 23-27, Tallyheads rated this episode: 8.35/10
See all The Office Season 5 ratings.
The Office Crime Aid quotes
Holly: I’m free tonight. Is that too eager? I don’t care. I’m free tonight.
Michael: Tonight’s no good. Because I am busy taking you out.
Michael: If she starts having sex with me, I’ll know for sure.
Andy: I am right in assuming that Dwight is short for D-Money.
Dwight: You set a date?
Phyllis: You’re making a knife with a knife?
Dwight: I know none of that. And if I did, you’d be the last to know.
Holly: Hell, yeah.
Michael: Probably get soup. Or something light.
Dwight: She introduced me to so many things. Pasteurized milk. Sheets. Monotheism. Presents on your birthday. Preventative medicine.
Dwight: Why is she marrying Andy?
Phyllis: Angela’s not really a risk taker. And Andy’s not really a risk.
Dwight: That’s really fattening.
Holly: Oh, after vous.
Michael: Thank vous.
Michael: Now they can’t hear us at all.
Angela: I need to cancel checks from 10,001 to 90,000.
Kevin: Yeah, well, they stole my surge protector. I’m now going to be prone to surges.
Dwight: Bravo, Watson.
Dwight: Looks like a classic seven-man job.
Dwight: Motives — financial, or possibly vintage HP computer collectors.
Michael: So much for sex without consequences.
Jim: The future mother of my children.
Andy: You’re always safe with me. I’m a very good screamer.
Creed: The last person to do this disappeared. His name? Creed Bratton.
Michael: It’s like Farm Aid. But instead of farms fighting against AIDS, it is us fighting against our own poverty.
Jim: Do you need us for any of this?
Holly: The boss scored The Boss.
Holly: He knows how to get things. He got me.
Dwight: Or you can say goodbye to this.
Dwight: You have until 6:14 pm.
Michael: Crime Reduces Innocence. Makes Everybody Angry. I Declare.
Michael: There is no Wikipedia entry for office robbery statistics.
Michael: Lights, camera, auction!
Darryl: And my personal favorite, Short People.
Michael: It squeaks when you bang it. That’s what she said.
Michael: It just says Creed.
Creed: Yeah, that’s all-inclusive.
Kevin: Federal and state.
Michael: I would appreciate it if people would stop storming off the stage.
Dwight: Okay, fine, I’ve moved on. Now how do I get her back?
Dwight: And you slap like a girl.
Jim: She’s engaged, um … to me.
Roy: I thought you were a friend.
Dwight: Three hundred … and one penny.
Jim: I’m not that guy. And we are not that couple.
Holly: A lot of Michael seems too good to be true. So far, it’s all true.
David: No. I did not know Michael was dating Holly.
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