The Office: Dwight Christmas, 9.09

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The Office: Dwight Christmas Belsnickel

Writer: Robert Padnick, Director: Charles McDougall

Summary (NBC): When the party planning committee drops the ball on the annual Christmas party, Dwight gets everyone to celebrate with a traditional Schrute German Christmas. Darryl fears Jim has forgotten his promise to take him along to the new job in Philadelphia. Meanwhile, Pete teaches Erin about his favorite movie Die Hard.

The Office Dwight Christmas extras

The Office Dwight Christmas rating

In a poll conducted December 6-10, 2012, Tallyheads rated this episode: 8.00/10

See all The Office Season 9 ratings.

The Office Dwight Christmas quotes

Manually transcribed by tanster :)

Jim: So you know my job has something to do with sports, but you don’t the end of the word “Philadelphia.”

Dwight: Don’t wear the blue striped shirt. It makes your neck look like an old mop handle.

Oscar: I didn’t realize how many of Angela’s opinions I agreed with. Until she tried to have my kneecaps shattered for sleeping with her husband. She makes a lot of very sound points.

Meredith: We’re out there, sweating our balls off every day, busting our balls. We deserve a Christmas party!

Kevin: Mini cupcakes, as in the mini version of regular cupcakes, which is already a mini version of cake, honestly, where does it end with you people?

Dwight: What about an authentic Pennsylvania Dutch Christmas? Drink some gluhwein, enjoy some hasenpfeffer… enjoy Christmas with St. Nicholas’ rural old German companion, Belsnickel!

Stanley: I want tropical Christmas.
Meredith: Topless Christmas.
Creed: Tapas Swiss Miss. Spanish tapas and Swiss Miss hot cocoa. What’s so hard to understand.

Dwight: The sepia tint is from an app on my phone. This is the same photo, Matrix style.

Jim: Am I the only one who wants to try hufflepuffs and schnauzerhosen, and meet this glenpickle guy?

Erin: German terrorists? That’s oddly specific.

Stanley: I love Philly. Dirty town.

Toby: You know who’s not going to get to work on some exciting new startup this year? George Howard Skub. Aka, the alleged Scranton Strangler.

Stanley: See you next Christmas.

Toby: I would start at the beginning, but I think I need to go farther back.

Pam: Dwight, there is one rule that you need to take very seriously. And that is, that there are no rules.
Dwight: You have never been cooler.

Jim: Best. Christmas. Ever.
Pam: You’re welcome.
Jim: Thank you.

Dwight: That is gluhwein, otherwise known as glow wine. Also used to sterilize medical instruments.

Dwight: This is the very spoon that guided my soft skull through the birth canal. When I was born. Enjoy.

Dwight: Somebody’s found the hog maw!

Dwight: This is celebrating Christmas for all of the right reasons.

Dwight: Have you ever tasted a shepherd’s crook?

Dwight: Excuse me. I have to run to my car to take a dump.
Kevin: Wish my car had a bathroom.

Pete: That is transcribed by some fan. They make mistakes.

Toby: Here’s the thing about moonlight. It’s not sunlight.

Kevin: I love this hog mama.

Dwight: I was born to be Belsnickel.

Jim: So he’s kind of like Santa. Except dirty. And worse.

Jim: It’s my favorite part of Christmas. The authority.
Pam: And the fear.

Dwight: The Belsnickel will decide if you are impish or admirable.

Jim: Now I’m going to be all whipped for my first day of work.

Jim: That was the perfect last Christmas party.

Dwight: You quit on Christmas, Christmas quits on you.

Toby: Forget everything you thought you knew about fingerprinting.

Darryl: Meredith’s a little cute, I’m just realizing! She got like an Emma Stone thing.

Erin: I’m still Andy’s girlfriend. But you can leave your arm.

Dwight: No thanks. I’ll just have another Dumatril.

Pam: What happened? Did you miss your bus?
Jim: No. I just missed my wife.

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