W: Jennifer Celotta, D: John Krasinski
Summary (NBC): When Sabre comes in to take over Dunder Mifflin, Michael struggles to accept Sabre’s new policies. Pam and Jim have an interview for a local daycare they really want to get into. Andy and Erin work on a welcome song for Sabre as Erin waits for Andy to ask her out. Guest star: Kathy Bates.
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- Jen Celotta and John Krasinski answer fan questions in the Sabre Q&A — an OfficeTally exclusive!
- Christian Slater talks to EW about his Sabre cameo. Tipster: mrsay1
- Photos: Pre-release photos | John Krasinski directs ‘Sabre’ | NBC.com gallery
- Suck it!
- Sabre Corporation website
- Joey Slotnick plays the daycare center director.
- Owen Daniels plays David Wallace’s son Teddy. He was last seen in the Season 3 episode, Cocktails. Owen is The Office executive producer Greg Daniels’ son.
- Nelson Franklin plays the IT guy. He also played the graphic design guy in Season 4’s Job Fair.
Michael: I got a big box, yes I do, I got a big box, how ’bout you?
Michael: Scissor me.
Michael: We probably could have saved our own asses. We didn’t need them touching our asses!
Michael: This cord has “Creed” written all over it.
Pam: Maybe we can put the box back together.
Dwight: Impossible. He opened it like an ape.
Creed: Have you tried making everything smaller?
Michael: Why do I have to explain everything?
Pam: Because we’re usually not on the same page.
Michael: You can really see he is okay taking a picture with me. Even though I was there for disciplinary reasons.
Dwight: Welcome. Scranton hot dog from Scranton?
Jim: Trained. Loving it. Good at it.
Andy: You sure it’s “Saber”?
Jim: Turns out a lot of parents want the very best for their children! That’s weird.
Jim: There’s always the army. The infantry.
Christian Slater: Have you ever tasted a rainbow? At Sabre, you will.
Jim: So you’ve been shown a nonsensical video. You’re probably wondering, what’s going on? Well you’re not alone.
Meredith: Talk about vacation days!
Michael: There is a small part of me that is actually very excited about this new company. But 70% of me is water. And the other part, the real part, the part that has feelings, and emotions, and thoughts, and makes decisions, and if I can be crass, makes babies, that part thinks that all of these changes suck b—-.
Michael: Really? You don’t have enough water in there? Your stomach?
Michael: I miss the old Dunder Mifflin. Too much change is not a good thing. Ask the climate.
Jim: Cubbies! I totally forgot about cubbies.
Pam: There’s a finger painting station! And a curly slide! Am I too old to go here?
Andy: The ball’s totally in Erin’s court. After the whole drum line thing.
Michael: Is Christian Slater back there? Because he knows, he’d know what to do.
Michael: He is not a big fan of me dropping by unannounced. But then again, who is.
David: Maybe we’ll go outside. Outside.
Jerry: Did you ever consider that you might not be as charming as you think you are?
Jim: This coming from the guy who still uses a children’s toilet?
Andy: That’s as hard as I can hint.
Michael: There are very few things that would make me not want to team up with David Wallace, and Suck It is one of them.
Michael: That’s not the David Wallace that I remember. That is some sort of weird creature that lives in David Wallace’s house.
Phyllis: Michael, this isn’t a toast. You’re just thinking out loud.
Michael: Wow, that is metallicky. That’s like drinking a battery. It really gets you in the fillings, doesn’t it?
David: Well it’s a mess, what a mess, what you gonna do? You’re gonna take out your Suck It and you suck it! Suck it! Take out your Suck It and you suck it!
In a poll conducted February 4-8, Tallyheads rated this episode: 7.80/10