The Office: Tallahassee, 8.15

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The Office: Tallahassee Dwight Schrute Nellie Bertram

Writer: Daniel Chun, Director: Matt Sohn

Summary (NBC): After Dwight and his team arrive in Tallahassee, Dwight competes with his Dunder Mifflin coworkers to impress Sabre special projects president, Nellie Bertram (Catherine Tate). Back in Scranton, Andy avoids being manager when several people in the office demand raises. Guest star: Catherine Tate.

The Office Tallahassee extras

The Office Tallahassee rating

In a poll conducted February 16-20, 2012, Tallyheads rated this episode: 8.47/10

See all The Office Season 8 ratings.

The Office Tallahassee quotes

Manually transcribed by tanster :)

Erin: I was reading the mattress tag and I fell asleep.

Erin: Stanley, wake up, it’s Pretzel Day!

Dwight: I gotta find Luwanda at The Alcohol Club.

Dwight: When I first met Pam, she said something that slightly rubbed me the wrong way. Since then, I’ve loved working with Pam, and she’s frankly wonderful, but I hate her.

Dwight: Okay, Twiggy, that’s enough, get in the car.

Erin: Who says none of us are diarrheal?

Dwight: I’m gonna set your face on fire.

Jim: Woah, Stanley. Did you just come back from burning down a rival nightclub?

Stanley: Wanna get in? You can work the iPod.

Jim: Loggins and Messina.
Stanley: Did I say Messina?

Creed: It’s so peaceful, I’ve already written like 12 plays today.

Meredith: Hey, can you pick up the pin? Some of us like to work in our bare feet.

Kelly: Will one of you get the phone? I am freaking out. I know it’s for me.

Stanley: Life is short. “Drive fast and leave a sexy corpse.” That’s one of my mottos.

Packer: Quick query, Halpert. Still queer?

Packer: You can’t put me down. Too strong.

Nellie: Stop looking at my breasts, and start looking at my penis.

Nellie: I went on a shopping spree. Very destructive, I bought 13 pianos.

Nellie: It has to be winter, and I reject it.

Dwight: What is the antidote?
Jim: True love’s kiss.

Dwight: Right Dwight, Right Dwight. Sorry, now you’ll never be able to get that out of your head.

Dwight: It can’t be appendicitis. I eat more than enough bacon.

Dwight: I’m a decent baiter. My cousin Mose, that’s a master baiter.

Stanley: I’m not bored. I’m a pirate.

Jim: I’ve spent so much of my life telling myself, “please, don’t end up like Stanley.” And now I’m wondering, if I even have what it takes.

Nellie: Humans… pyramid. Human pyramid.

Packer: Dude, don’t you yak on me. This shirt’s Van Heusen.

Jim: The one thing Pam made sure I knew, Florida’s pretty loose with the death penalty.

Ryan: Who called it? Nothing but net.

Dwight: Don’t remember me like this. Remember me as the man who pulled down the screen.

Dwight: Philip, if you’re hearing this memo, that can only mean one thing. I’m dead. You are the rightful heir to Schrute Farms. Please, you must do one thing. Kill Mose before he kills you. Mose, hey, it’s Dwight. Listen, I just want to give you a heads up.

Dwight: You guys sound just like the enemies of Seabiscuit.

Dwight: Consumers are mindless lemmings. They just want to be told what to do.

Dwight: The menstrual cycle determines every choice a woman makes.

Nellie: What are the three pillars of retail?
Erin: Convenience.
Dwight: Ingredients.
Erin: Service.
Dwight: Burgers.
Erin: Building loyalty.
Dwight: Killing royalty.

Dwight: You know what is important? Is Dwight’s pillars. And there is only one. Desire.

Darryl: I know you want reception today, but tomorrow you won’t want to do her. She’s a dog.

Dwight: Just lost four ounces of appendix. Already replaced it with muscle.

Nellie: I give you Wally Amos, founder of Famous Amos Cookies!

Famous: Is it oatmeal with no raisins?
Erin: I’m sorry I wasted your time.

Icon provided by pessimistreader.


  1. sounds pretty great!!

    although I think they’ve milked the “Andy has a boss-related problem” episode pretty heavily, this has potential to do pretty well

    but I’m not looking forward to Catherine Tate…not funny. at all.

  2. I’m so excited Catherine Tate is back! They didn’t use her to her potential last time, so I hope we get to see some of it here. I absolutely love her on Doctor Who and her show, the Catherine Tate Show is amazing and hilarious.

  3. I’ve never been a fan of 1/2 the ofice being away. I agree enough with Andy as an incompetent manager.

  4. Agreed about Catherine Tate not being funny. I really hope this is just a one-episode stint for her…

  5. Catherine Tate is one of my favorite people in the world. I think if more people saw her on Doctor Who, they would love her as much as I do. She is an amazing and talented person. Can’t wait to see what she brings to the show… I mean, does it get stranger than Robert California? :)

  6. Andy avoids being manager when several people in the office demand raises…Is he going to determine who gets a raise by putting beans on their pictures?

  7. Catherine Tate is hilarious! Give her a chance, and check out The Catherine Tate Show which ran from 2004 – 2009. I agree with Anne, that Tate was not used to her potential in her The Office appearance. If the writers really do their job, then she will deliver lots of funny.

  8. Catherine Tate was NOT funny in Search Committee, but I’m all for Dwight-centric episodes, so I guess it all evens out. Anyone know if this could lead to Jo’s return? As I understand, she’s still with Sabre as Chairwoman of the Board.

  9. LOVE Catherine Tate, she’s the best hope to save The Office this season. She’s got that ability to be very funny and can make you cry as well. Can’t wait for her to arrive!

  10. I can’t stand CT from what I have seen in her own show, but I guess I can give her another chance here as long as she doesn’t hang around.
    I feel like the last thing this show needs is yet more characters competing for camera time. As for female characters, Pam will be back, and Erin and Angela have developed to where they have shown they can play a more central role – I wish they would use them all more instead, as it is we don’t see enough of them. Pam barely did anything before she left.

    I’m really glad that this season they didn’t go ahead with plans for Jordan, the new accountant guy, Stanley’s daughter(???!), and Poochie to all join the cast. Less is more.

  11. @16: I agree, but at the same time, I am a fan of anything that gives Stanley more screen time, and his daughter was supposed to do that. Does anyone know if that story hasn’t officially been given up?

  12. I’m excited to see Catherine Tate again. I thought she was a lot funnier in Search Committee than people gave her credit for.
    But it says that Dwight’s trying to compete with other people to impress her?
    I hope this isn’t another “everyone try to impress the boss” kind of situation…

  13. I have only seen Catherine Tate on the finale and I did not find her funny. Hopefully this episode will show her potential that most of her fans talk about. Overall, I’m excited for the episode! :)

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