The Office: Test The Store, 8.17

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The Office: Test The Store

Writer: Mindy Kaling, Director: Brent Forrester

Summary (NBC): The Florida team readies the new Sabre Store — Dwight prepares a theatrical presentation to impress Nellie at the Sabre Store opening. In Scranton, Andy shows up to work with an embarrassing injury. Guest stars: Catherine Tate, Georgia Engel, Tig Notaro.

The Office Test The Store extras

  • Promos
  • Check out the Sabre products Pyramid and Arrowhead.
  • The song playing during Jim’s presentation is Clocks by Coldplay.
  • During my visit to The Office on January 19, editor Claire Scanlon showed me a scene she was editing related to the theatrical presentation. It’s pretty eye-opening. (Yes, Jim wears eyeliner.)
  • Tig Notaro guest stars as the mother of the girl who punches Andy in the face.

The Office Test The Store rating

In a poll conducted March 1-5, 2012, Tallyheads rated this episode: 7.824/10

See all The Office Season 8 ratings.

The Office Test The Store quotes

Manually transcribed by tanster :)

Ryan: Are you holding this chair, ’cause I feel like I’m going to fall off. I’m not wearing the right shoes for this.

Dwight: Your tiny fingers make the best knots.

Erin: Hey, my name’s Tabitha. I’m camped out in front of the Sabre store so I can be first in line for the new Pyramid.

Nellie: Now I know you probably all think I’m this Patrician goddess.

Nellie: I was born in the little working class town of Basildon.

Nellie: What’s lower than dirt?
Dwight: Loam, magna, mantle, outer core, inner core.

Jim: Which Spice Girl.
Nellie: The black one. I never stood a chance.

Dwight: For a tech company, press can only mean one thing. Bloggers.

Dwight: Bloggers are gross. Bloggers are obese. Bloggers have halitosis. You’re going to love them.

Packer: As soon as he messes up, I swoop in like a sexual predator.

Dwight: Speaking of pimples, let’s release the bloggers!

Kelly: So much time has passed. It’s like my life is buffering.

Cathy: I always get in trouble around bloggers. I’m trying to be a good girl for once.

Toby: I’ll go put on my cup.

Blogger: This is a perfect photo for my daily fail blog.

Nellie: Dwight, what is a fail. That sounds bad.

Jim: Is there anything I can do? Maybe pretend to be Chuck?

Dwight: Surrender the tri-pack.

Dwight: Point it towards the store, idiot.

Dwight: Tell your great grandson to bring his kid by.

Dwight: The elderly suck the life out of the young. Get them out of here!

Toby: I. A. A. T. G. It’s all about the groin.

Toby: You would like The Turn of the Table. The latest Chad Flenderman novel.

Angela: Can I please leave? I have a rape flute.

Dwight: Cathy, I would like to introduce you to Fatty Gruesome.

Ryan: I wish Kelly were here. She always knew what to say.

Dwight: You’re smarter than Mark Zuckerberg and those Google guys all combined.

Ryan: Get me something yellow or green from a nearby store. Not red!

Toby: If your attacker is willing to defile a corpse, you better stop playing dead right away.

Tiffy: Sorry I kicked your ass in front of your “thin” girlfriend.

Pam: How about we wait ’til next year after you have your kid?

Toby: My ex-wife used to demolish me.

Darryl: Omigod. I think I see the imprint of a ring pop.

Ryan: Honestly I could use a prescription for Ritalin right now.

Ryan: I know you’re my boss, but seriously, you need to get the hell out of my face.

Nellie: Your little man is unraveling.

Erin: Sorry about kicking you out. It’s just we don’t want our brand associated with death.

Lady: I’ll go to the Costco and search for handsome men.

Lady: Someone rejected you? With that body and those bazongas? Forget him.

Dwight: This is not the face of a performer. This is the face of a scary apparition you see before you die.

Dwight: You are wearing eyeliner, Jim.

Jim: This is the future. Because this is the past.

Jim: You can play anything. From Chuck. To Cars 2.

Jim: With the Pyramid, you have the connection to everything. In time. And space.

Ryan: Sabre. It’s time. To come home.

Kevin: Whether it’s a gremlin or Chucky the doll, the key is to throw it in something. Like a fireplace. Or a tub of electricity.

Angela: I think Kelly should attack Toby.

Andy: You may want to ask yourselves, where were you when the girls came?

Dwight: We could have integrated more Chuck into the presentation.

Icon provided by pessimistreader.

71 comments

  1. I’m pretty sure this is the episode Brian Baumgartner directed. He tweeted last night that the episode he directed premieres in two weeks.

    And, secondly, Andy’s “embarrassing injury” sounds a lot like Michael’s incident with the George Foremen grill…

  2. Hmmm, maybe Andy’s embarrassing injury is his foot burned by a foreman grill. Now that would be original. ;)

  3. “Embarrassing injury?” It must be pretty bad if it’s more embarrassing than the injury he suffered at Jim and Pam’s wedding! :-)

  4. Yikes… Nellie is STILL there! Why can’t they let the original cast shine without these awkward guest stars! Robert is finally gone and now we have to deal with her? I really miss M. Scott.

  5. @Mose Robert is not gone and he is not a guest star. He will be back for at least four more episodes.

  6. @Mose, I miss Michael, too. I think it would be pretty realistic, actually, if Pam went to his wedding (and perhaps Dwight and Andy, too?). Steve has to come back for at least an episode, I always thought that they’d at least reference him – because Michael would definitely want to know how everyone was doing. The new baby Phillip(s), Erin’s love life (or lack thereof), etc.

  7. I hope Andy’s injury doesn’t have to do with his scrotum again, or doesn’t look like Michael’s injury with his George Foreman grill.

  8. The good news is that based on the new spoilers about story details it’s safe to say they aren’t ENDING the series this season, so as long as The Office gets picked up which I’m sure it will then we will have it for at least one more.

  9. didn’t think this episode was hilarious…
    it kind of lost the momentum of Tallahassee and After Hours, but I’m excited to see the wrapping up of the Florida arc!

  10. My dvr didn’t record it for some reason. First time this has happened with a new episode of The Office. So, I’m out of the loop tonight.

  11. Hi I’m a fan of the office and I just found this website today. Are we supposed to avoid posting spoilers here or can we discuss “Test the Store” freely?

    [ from tanster: welcome, and feel free to post your thoughts about this episode! :) ]

  12. another great episode, this story has been the best thing that’s happened to this season. Based on the story spoilers that were released this season looks to go out with a bang with a bunch of funny plot lines.

  13. i thought this episode was great! so many funny moments. creed was great and i am glad that ryan had a bigger part! jim did an awesome job! oh and i think erin should dress like that all the time that style really suited her! 10/10

  14. Maybe it was my mood, but I didn’t find this episode funny…not one LOL moment for me!

  15. Does anyone know if that was Jean Stapleton in this episode… she was the old lady walking down the street with a cane

  16. This episode was just okay for me. I did like Jim spinning the sign at the end and also Pam’s insult. (Poor Jenna though! They keep picking on her) I feel like the Florida arc is starting to lose steam though, so I think I’m ready for everyone to head back to Scranton soon. ;)

  17. Odd, this was definitely my favorite episode from the arc. I can’t believe I didn’t think it was Mindy who wrote this one because of the injury..duh. On that note Mindy delivers once again. That Jim presentation had me laughing so hard!

  18. I thought this episode was pretty hilarious, many lol moments! I loved Creed’s scream, Pam’s comment to the girl, and Jim’s eyeliner. Erin was pretty great too. But I’m getting a little sick of Nellie.

  19. I loved it and thought it was incredibly funny along with the past few episodes. I like Nellie too. I miss crazy Jan and she can fill that.

  20. Believe it or not, the elderly woman with Erin was Georgia Engel, Mrs. Ted Baxter from the “Mary Tyler Moore Show”….

  21. I thought this episode was hilarious, I laughed so much. It might be my favorite this season.

    As the old woman with Erin, yes it is Georgia Engel. I know her best from Everybody Loves Raymond as Robert’s mother-in-law/Amy’s mother.

  22. I am elated. They made such a turn around. Every moment of the past couple episodes i’ve been on the edge of my seat. Really! fantastic comeback guys!

  23. I’m surprised that a lot of people liked this. For me it was mediocre and I felt Mindy dropped the ball after the last two excellent episodes. Erin’s chat with the old lady was a low point, and felt like it was from a lesser, more crass sitcom. It wasn’t terrible, but very disappointing – the timing was off, and the jokes were poorly executed or forced.

    However, congratulations Dwight.

  24. This is my first time on the site. Huge Office fan. Anyways this was a great episode. Looks like they have hit their stride with a string of awesome episodes. Let’s hope they keep it up.

  25. When Kathy said being the hot girl was “her idea” her face was absolutely adorable. Wowee.

    Also, Kelly attacking Toby was pretty funny.

  26. Another strong episode. I have loved Jim and Dwight working so close together. They have reenergized the show for me. I am ready for them to go back to Scranton though.
    Poor Jenna, I hope they are done with the fat jokes. It’s very refreshing to see what a woman who had a baby should look like instead of what Hollywood does. She did have the best one liner though.

    [ from tanster: wait til you see what happens with Dwight and Jim next week! ]

  27. @Sarakaya Komzin: It didn’t record for me either! (Luckily I noticed right away and found it on another channel – just missed the cold open.) My series recording was for NBC at 9PM, and they changed it to 6PM for some reason. But I’m in Canada, so it might not be the same problem.

    I actually thought this episode was hilarious. It was the first time I found Nellie funny, and the dynamics were great. My favourite moment was when Creed hit Meredith and just ran out of the conference room!

  28. Excellent episode!!!!! I loved to see Jim & Dwight cooperating with each other. And I also liked how Andy stood for Pam again, although he was punched. And I hated to see him punched twice.

  29. Might have been the greatest Creed moment ever in this episode… If you have it on DVR, go to that moment, pause it, and then play in slow-mo and watch Creed’s face. I nearly died laughing.

    Yay for the Office being funny again!

  30. @fieldysnutz: As soon as I read your comment I remembered Georgia Engel from Everybody loves Raymond,but the first thing that popped into my head was Howard’s wife on coach. It’s weird how different people remember actors from different shows.

  31. What the heck was going on with Ryan??? It was like an alien took over his body! Since when is Ryan a blanket carrying, thumb sucking, momma’s boy? He wants to talk to his mom to give him confidence! Yikes that was terrible!!!

  32. I agree with NC comment – mediocre episode at best (especially compared to the last few). However, I do love when Jim and Dwight help each other out. No big deal though The show has been on a streak of great episodes so I’m sure that will
    Continue.

  33. Good episode. Jim’s presentation was hilarious. I didn’t like the hit by a girl storyline though. Why does Andy lie about this kind of thing? He got hit. Why were they making fun of him? Would they rather he beat up a child?

  34. Um Ryan has always been like that.
    He even took his mom’s car to work one season ( or still does)

  35. Ryan has always been like that, P.Louise. Remember when he backed out of being a presenter for Andy’s paper conference? He still lives with his Mom and drives her car to work.

  36. Episode gold. Everything was spot on.

    Oh, and I screamed like a fan girl when I saw the Chuck cut out in the beginning. My favorite show mentions my other favorite show? Squee!

  37. Not my fav of the season and usually I love Mindy’s scripts. There were moments obviously. Glad Cathy had a funny line as they need to make her more human. Maybe will get a 6/7 from me.

  38. Someone needs to make a gif of Creed’s hit/scream/run.

    Another fantastic episode– I loved Pam’s comeback.

    I wonder, if someone bought two pyramids, or possibly four, could they put them together and then watch Chuck or Cars 2 in the way that they were meant to be seen? As is, at best you can only watch half the show or only see it on a fraction of the screen.

    Do you think that Kelly learned her fighting skills from her time in juvie?

    One other thing: in the quotes section, the “patrician goddess” line is attributed to Erin when it should be Nellie. [ from tanster: thanks, fixed! ]

  39. Great episode topped with cameos by Simpsons writers. My favorite of the season so far!

  40. @dirwuf (#31) Thank-you, I instantly recognized Georgia Engel’s voice, but couldn’t place it. You saved me a tiny bit of being driven crazy by that.

    Yes, Pam did have the best line. I not only took it to be a slam on her physique, but also to her winding up a middle school mom. To be honest, I seriously thought she was a boy at first.

    @Tabitha the hipster (#48) Absolutely agree with you on the getting hit by a girl bit. Andy stood up for Pam which was admirable and what does he get for it? There is truth to the adage ‘No good deed goes unpunished’. It’s not really like he could have done anything to her without facing jail time. Not funny just lame.

  41. Jim, Dwight, Pam and occasionally Creed. A.K.A the reason why I’m still watching this show.

  42. what is the name of the music from jim’s sabre presentation? It was wonderful.

    [ from tanster: Clocks by Coldplay. ]

  43. Good episode, and probably a slight improvement over the last episode, “After Hours”, which was somewhat mediocre. I think they should give Mindy Kaling some more lines as Kelly because a majority of her one-liners in the past few episodes have been quite funny. Jim’s presentation was definitely the best part, but the Scranton subplot about Andy I found lazy, with only a few funny parts. The Sabre plot was definitely funny, but the one actually in the office workplace wasn’t nearly as funny.

  44. The Andy gets punched by a little girl plot made absolutely no sense. Why would a gang of fifth grade girls be throwing stuff at a pregnant woman in the first place? I mean, we know that Pam probably deserves it (how low has Pam sunk that she is now the most loathsome character on the show? I even like Packer more than her now.), but there is no way kids would physically antagonize an adult stranger. However, it did give us the moment of Creed implementing “Strike, Scream, and Run.”

    The Sabre plot was much stronger, and actually quite funny. I liked that they commented on Krasinski’s resemblance to Chuck. Dwight pretending to be Kelly (and Ryan’s response) was hilarious.

  45. I like the little details. When everyone punched an imaginary bigger opponent, Andy punched an imaginary smaller opponent. The end tag reminded me of Kevin vs The Mad Drummer.

  46. @60, I get that you don’t like Pam – I really don’t understand why, she’s my favourite character and I find her adorable – but each to their own. But “loathsome”?! What has she ever done that you consider “loathsome”? A lot of characters on this show have done some mean and horrible things over the years, but Pam?! Why is she worse than Packer?! And what has she ever done to deserve a bunch of kids throwing things at her? I honestly find your vitriol shocking and puzzling. What show are you watching where Pam is apparently evil?!

  47. Love the Toby in this episode! Thus far this season he has been lame, but he was pretty funny in this one

  48. @Michael McFadden “We” know that Pam is the most loathsome character on the show? You might want to modify that to just you. I know it’s all hip and trendy to hate on Jim and Pam, but not everyone agrees.

  49. @60 Care to elaborate on why Pam is worse than Packer now? Sure she is more assertive and competitive with Angela now but how is she the most loathsome? I agree that in season 6 they totally ruined her but since season 7 all she has become one of the more caring and nicer people in the office.

  50. @Lita (#61) I totally forgot about the dueling drummers sequence, nice comparison. Yes the tag was amazing, probably the best part of this episode as I was a bit underwhelmed by this one. Where did they find that guy?

    I’m not sure how much range Ellie Kemper will get to show as Erin so it was cute seeing her step “out of character” as a hipster. Okay Florida-Stanley the Manley, between ladies’ man Stanley and the Joker-Roker: mid-life crisis much? I feel the need … the need for Creed! By the way the girl’s mom was very diplomatic. It’s nice to see that anywhere these days.

    Dwight tied with Pam for best line of the show, “This is the face of a scary apparition you see before you die.” Runner-ups include: Meredith’s “What’s this about a black guy in the office?” & Kelly’s “It’s like my life is buffering.” Oh yeah, another penis reference, I need to start paying closer attention to these things. (Twss?)

  51. Mixed episode. Although it had some very funny parts it wasn’t overall as good as MK’s last effort. Florida was interesting but now I’m looking forward to everyone getting back.
    The end with Jim doing the sign stuff with the other guy was one of the best parts. And Erin was good as the hipster.
    And yeah, what exactly was Andy supposed to do – hit young girls?
    I hoped the Florida arc would make progress with Andy/Erin but now they seem to be dragging it for no real reason and not getting much value. Just watched some S6 recently and was reminded of how many funny moments these two used to have together, Erin seemed to have more depth and both of them just seemed funnier. I’m hoping they do reunite -it would be interesting after 8 years to finally see a happy couple on this show not named JAM (and even though the writers struggle with stories for JAM, will/won’t-they plots can’t go on forever).
    Overall an OK episode for this season.

  52. Just a little thing I noticed…Pam’s blouses over the past two episodes. She wore two identical blouses – a scoop neck style with a satin stripe down the middle. One in burgundy, one in ivory. And she had a slightly similar style in gray in “After Hours.” One of those little tidbits that sort of registered in my mind and I had to go back and look.

  53. This episode had some big laughs, but not much else, although the “Creed moment” caught me so off guard I had to get up off the floor and rewind because I had missed some – which I haven’t done with the Office since… I don’t even know. Toby was great too (did you notice that by the end of the ep, Toby’s whiteboard read “Begging for Mercy” as the topic?), Because of the “not much else”, however, I would’ve given it 7/10, but I love Coldplay, so I have to give it an 8/10. Is it true a lot of extras were Simpsons writers?

  54. I actually liked the Scranton part more than the Florida part (Something is wrong with me).

    The good thing for the Florida part is the end tag and Jim’s awkward presentation.

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