The Office: Turf War, 8.23

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The Office: Turf Wars

Writers: Warren Lieberstein and Halsted Sullivan
Director: Daniel Chun

Summary (NBC): Who gets all the clients left behind — Andy takes a break from flambéing cherries and composing rock operas to jumpstart his Dunder Mifflin comeback. When Robert drunkenly shuts down a nearby branch, Jim and Dwight join forces to outsmart a salesman from Scranton’s uglier sister city. Guest stars: James Spader, Catherine Tate, Chris Bauer.

The Office Turf War extras

The Office Turf War rating

In a poll conducted May 3-7, 2012, Tallyheads rated this episode: 7.75/10

See all The Office Season 8 ratings.

The Office Turf War quotes

Gabe: Oh man, my delts are blasted.

Dwight: Protein powder, huh? Cut it with water? Why don’t you just take estrogen?

Dwight: Feast on this, Lewis!

Dwight: Jim, tell him where he stick his grapes!
Jim: In the fridge!

Robert: I had a one-man saturnalia last night.

Robert: In vino, veritas, as they say.

Nellie: The answer is yes, yes, yes, yes, and never.

Robert: Why don’t you list the things that would keep you from helping me.

Erin: Jim, Dwight, what are your last names?

Toby: I like to think Lloyd Gross is a no-nonsense guy who doesn’t back down from anybody. And he calls people “kemosabe.”

Robert: Shaping a company is, in a sense, similar to training a geisha.

Dwight: Does this thing have turbo? Nitrous? Hit the nos.
Jim: Nos? You mean like in “Fast and Furious”?

Angela: Hello, my clucking hens! Got room for another in the roost?

Angela: Robert sent me to take over if Pam fails. If?

Gabe: Sometimes I wonder if I have ovaries in my scrotum. Because I am great at girl talk.

Gabe: I think you’re going to need to have an Asian fetish, yeah. It’ll be upsetting if you don’t.

Andy: My wireless password is eatpraylove. Easy to remember.

Dwight: My pants fell down! I don’t have a belt!

Jim: Big Red Paper Company?

Dwight: Jim couldn’t land me in a thousand years.
Jim: But you’re saying there’s a chance?

Nellie: Can I do it, Pam? Can I pull off a gold Arabian sandal?

Nellie: Robert is a filthy beast.

Pam: Sometimes he talks about flesh. And bacchanals.

Nellie: Things are looking up. I might be a mother soon, I have Mastercard right where I want them, and I have a new friend. A friend. At work.

Dwight: Wait. You don’t even care about nationals.

Icon provided by pessimistreader.


  1. Hopefully we will see more Erin/Andy action here. It is not in the descriptions since Welcome Party. :-(

  2. OK. This is getting ridiculous. These episode summaries are out of control. They are insane. What happened to our Office? Surely this is the last season, yes? The writers are winding this down to an absurdist, 30 Rock-ish ending. And that’s too bad. Because that’s the thing that’s made The Office great: that we all actually know people like this; that we actually work in environments like this. Again, too bad.

  3. I can’t wait for this episode. The summary doesn’t give too much away, but I long to see Andy back in the manager’s seat.

  4. While I was initially excited after reading the description for this episode I’ve come to realize it just sounds like a bunch of episodes from the past just put together.

  5. @#7, you’re right, Michael Scott Paper Company + The Sting (i.e Danny Cordray, who never showed up after his two episode stint….)

    Still, if it’ll get Andy back to where he’s supposed to be, I’m willing to give this episode a chance!

  6. I should be hating everything I’m reading about Andy’s plotline for the end of Season 8–especially because some of it sounds nearly identical to the story P&R did when Ben Wyatt resigned from the Pawnee city government and was totally adrift for a while–but honestly, I kind of like this notion. Andy is weird enough, and Ed Helms talented enough, to make this into a kind of an anti-epic showdown against the awful, awful Nellie Bertram. It’ll work as long as they have some triumph for Andy along the lines of the one Michael Scott in Season 5’s “Broke”.

  7. How awesome would it be for Andy to form his own paper company. Most of the cast could join him and the few that don’t want to be back next season can leave without the show just getting rid of them. It would also make sense because Robert isn’t coming back next season either. For some reason, even though this season was the worst in 8 years, it leaves so many possible cool plots for season 9! Renew it NBC!!

  8. I admit the plot summary for Fundraiser sounds a little bit ridiculous but I don’t see anything absurd about this one

  9. I don’t think we will see Andy starting his own company. Perhaps Robert fires Angry Andy for his office meltdown but then in turn gets fired himself by Jo Bennett, allowing Andy to return to his old job?

  10. Uhhhh…there really isn’t anything too ridiculous about this summary. And I’ve never understood why people get so bent out of shape about a two sentence summary anyway.

  11. @12, Limey…

    I thought Robert basically walked in and “took” Jo’s job, according to Jim in “The List? This isn’t the first time Jo has been mentioned before this season. In one recent episode, Robert mentions her as his boss and apparently she gave Nellie the Special Project Manger role, but I thought she was no longer with the company.

    And whatever happened to Cathy after Florida? No more mention of her at all. Two continuity gaps there, not to even mention Jordan from last season.

  12. as much as i love the office i don’t get why they keep recycling plot ideas. if it’s good i won’t really care but geez, there have been a lot of episodes this season that have given me deja vu. (eg. the cold open with andy not picking up the phone in order to impress his client, the “injury esque one”)

    there was also this one season 7 episode where jim was testing to see if there was anything stanley WOULDN’T notice. it strongly reminded me of the episode where they test if creed would notice he’s eating a potato instead of an apple. again any casual viewer won’t really notice these things so it’s mainly just criticism from a hardcore office guy…

  13. 15, Adam, Jo stepped down as CEO in favour of Robert, but she’s still the owner of the company so she still is both Robert and Nellie’s boss. There was a deleted scene from Special Project in which Dwight said he would take Kathy to Florida because Andy was going to fire her anyway since Pam was back, so Kathy’s job ended when the Florida trip did. And Jordan was never mentioned again because the actress left the show, so they probably reckoned that since Deangelo hired her, we could assume she was fired by corporate after Deangelo left.

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