The Office: Welcome Party, 8.20

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Writer: Steve Hely, Director: Ed Helms

Summary (NBC): the office plans a welcome party for Nellie — Robert makes the office throw a welcome party for Nellie, and the party planners try to sabotage it. Meanwhile, Andy and Erin practice how Andy will break up with Jessica. Guest stars: James Spader, Catherine Tate, Eleanor Siegler.

The Office Welcome Party extras

The Office Welcome Party rating

In a poll conducted April 12-16, 2012, Tallyheads rated this episode: 6.38/10

See all The Office Season 8 ratings.

The Office Welcome Party quotes

Manually transcribed by tanster :)

Jim: “Glad they didn’t mix up your tonsillectomy with a mustachectomy.”

Jim: Stanley doesn’t have a mustache.

Jim: The man’s worked here for 25 years. How can none of us picture his face?

Dwight: Neither of those looks like any person that has ever existed or been dreamt of in the history of human insanity.

Robert: “Good morning, Robert,” says no one, because the receptionist is in Florida.

Robert: Is this a video conference you’re having with Drake featuring Swizz Beatz?

Robert: I’ve never believed willpower was very important in a woman.

Nellie: No offense, but are there a lot of Irish people living around here?

Nellie: Ay caramba! The natives are getting restless!

Erin: I knew you as a lover, and I’ll remember you as a gentleman.

Dwight: Don’t listen to Jim. Have you ever seen him play Tetris? “Oh, I think I’ll just use this line horizontally.”

Dwight: Watch the great Schrutini work his magic.

Nellie: Nothing is more repellant than magicians.

Jim: Just haulin’ cube with Dwight.

Dwight: I wonder if king sized sheets are called presidential sized in England. I really should have a Tweeter account.

Jim: “Nellie, don’t open stupid. Love, Nellie.”

Nellie: I see you’ve discovered Benjamin. That’s what I call my box full of photos of Henry.

Dwight: If it would help you to forget, I could hit you in the brainstem with this candlestick.

Phyllis: We’re not stopping this train, so get off the tracks.

Andy: Do you want a gummy penis?

Darryl: Andy was Jellyroll, Mike was Dennis the Menace, Ryan was douchebag…
Ryan: That’s not a code name. That’s just an insult.
Oscar: Plus everyone would know who you meant.
Ryan: Yeah.

Creed: Everybody get comfy now. This first song’s over a half hour long.

Creed: Best gig ever. They ask me to play only originals. I said, have you heard my originals? They’re terrible. They said, even better. I said, I get it. It’s an ironic party for Nellie.

Andy: Super honesty time. I’m gay.

Andy: I had to imagine I was in a steam room with John Stamos.

All: We hate Pam! We hate Pam! We hate Pam! We hate Pam!

Erin: I feel really tired. Probably from seeing that turkey when we drove by the farm.

Magician: No hablo el cardo, señor?

Robert: Why is Jim treating the magician poorly?

Kevin: You think this is a great party? This cake has vegetables in it! Like a salad bar, Robert.

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