The Office: A.A.R.M., 9.22-23

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The Office: A.A.R.M.

Writer: Brent Forrester, Director: David Rogers

Summary (NBC): As the office readies for the premiere of the documentary that night, Jim convinces Dwight, who is planning to propose to Esther (Nora Kirkpatrick), that he needs an Assistant to the Assistant Regional Manager, and holds tryouts to find the best candidate. Angela brings her baby to work after her daycare turns her away. Meanwhile, Andy attends auditions for “The Next Great A Cappella Sensation.” Guest stars: Aaron Rodgers, Clay Aiken, Mark McGrath, Santigold, Jessica St. Clair, Scot Robinson. One-hour long, starting 9/8c.

The Office A.A.R.M. extras

The Office A.A.R.M. rating

In a poll conducted May 9-13, 2013, Tallyheads rated this episode: 9.42/10

See all The Office Season 9 ratings.

The Office A.A.R.M. quotes

Manually transcribed by tanster :)

Erin: The tea in Nepal is very hot.
Kevin: But the coffee in Peru is much hotter.

Dwight: It’s not the KGB, but it’s a start!

Dwight: I’d like to get harmful steam, but the prices are absurd!

Dwight: Break protocol! Break protocol!

Creed: I’m saving a fortune on dry cleaning!

Oscar: Ironic that now it’s Angela who’s living in the closet.

Oscar: Saddle shoes with denim. I will literally call child protective services.

Dwight: Don’t worry. They’ll get got.

Dwight: This is my grandmother’s ring. It was made from a bullet I took out of her left buttock. She was a moonshiner shot by Adolf Coors. This is my grandmother’s buttock bullet ring.

Andy: On this show, all three judges are mean.

Dwight: Together, we run a no-nonsense office.

Pam: I love Goofy Jim.

Jim: Your agenda-taking pleases him.

Angela: Apparently my station in life has descended to a depth even they won’t forgive.

Meredith: I’ve been on my best behavior for nine years. If it wasn’t for the cameras, I would have done some truly vulgar crap.

Oscar: When this thing started, I was still having sex with women. As was Kevin, I believe.

Creed: If my parents see this, I am toast.

Jim: I’m going to need you to look at your hierarchy mobile.

Jim: How would King Arthur choose the next knight of his Round Table?

Andy: I am nothing if not a total pitch bitch.

Andy: Pour some Sugar Ray on me!

Jim: Absolutely, we do.

Dwight: You’ll always have the upper hand when you have a good AARM. Trademark pending.

Jim: Sure, every participant will be getting a corn dog, but that’s for fueling only, no savoring.

Pete: What’s the opposite of a horse?

Andy: All you got to do is risk your life for this country and everyone goes gaga for you.

Andy: Is this a show about the resiliency of the human spirit, or is it a show about singing?

Andy: Wait til they get a good feel of me.

Erin: Are you kidding? You broke our hearts.

Dwight: Anyone who needs to speak to me, has got to go through me first.

Pam: I’m afraid I’m not enough for you.

Darryl: These dudes are definitely in a weird mood.

Meredith: Did we ever get loaded and listen to Zeppelin in my van?

Kevin: Tell Phillip that his stupid little baby wish came true.

Dwight: Smart baby. That’s the most flavorful bond.

Dwight: The way that boy looks at the Galactica is precisely the way I look at the Galactica! And he eats the same kind of paper I do.

Oscar: You don’t want to wake up the grumpy old walrus, do you?

Aaron Rodgers: Flag on the play.

Kevin: I’m giving you the silence treatment.

Kevin: What a chubbers.

Dwight: Genes so pure, you could lick them.

Jim: Not enough for me? You are everything.

Darryl: I’m gonna miss these guys.

Dwight: I will raise a hundred children with a hundred of your lovers if it means I can be with you!

Dwight: This expresses how loudly I love you!

Oscar: One thing we do know. Nothing will ever be the same.

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