The Office: Andy’s Play, 7.03

« Previous episodeNext episode »

The Office Andy's Play Sweeney Todd

Writer: Charlie Grandy, Director: John Stuart Scott

Summary (NBC): Andy invites the entire office to his community theater production of Sweeney Todd in hopes that Erin will attend. Michael tries to put his jealousy aside and enjoy the performance while Jim and Pam struggle with their incompetent babysitter.

The Office Andy’s Play extras

The Office Andy’s Play rating

In a poll conducted October 7-11, Tallyheads rated this episode: 8.15/10

See all The Office Season 7 ratings.

The Office Andy’s Play quotes

Erin: Did you write this?
Andy: No.
Erin: Who did?
Andy: Steven Sondheim.
Erin: Who is he?
Angela: What the hell is happening?

Andy: We’re the cast of Sweeney Todd, The Demon Barber of Fleet Street. We open in a couple of weeks at the Loose Screw Playhouse here in Scranton and today just doing a wee bit of viral marketing.

Andy: Two comps. For my lady and her Gabe. It’s closing night. Tomorrow we have to give the theater over to the Scranton’s Miss Fitness Pageant.

Andy: Gabe is not coming, which is huge because my plan is to make Erin fall back in love with me tonight. Women cannot resist a man singing show tunes. It’s so powerful, even a lot of men can’t resist a man singing show tunes.

Michael: They say that no one can take your pride, but the people who cast Andy’s play, they took mine.
Dwight: Last time I went to the theater, a man dressed as a cat sat on my lap.

Andy: I’m asking you thespian to thespian. Will you please be the bigger man and come to my show?
Michael: I wish I could, Andy, but I can’t. I have plans that night. I’m going to see a friend in a play called Sweeney Todd. You’re that friend. I’m going to see your play.

Michael: And scene.

Dwight: Let’s just knock this out right now. Disrobe.

Dwight: Angela? Don’t like her anymore. Not attracted to her anymore. Just contractually obligated to make a baby with her.

Dwight: Alright fine, I’ll go to your little show, but I’m not wearing a cape.

Angela: Dwight and I have a contractual agreement to procreate five times, plain and simple. And should he develop feelings for me, well that would be permissible under Item 7C, Clause 2, so I would not object.

Stanley: You brought balloons to a play?
Michael: I did. Because I am being the bigger man, and balloons are bigger than flowers.
Phyllis: It’s nice. Like ‘Up.’

Usher: Are you the guy that did an entire Law & Order episode for his audition?

Erin: I really wanted to see Andy’s play, because he’s so, so talented. But I’ve been trying to get in the babysitting game forever. The 13-year olds in this town have a complete monopoly. It’s almost like a babysitters club.

Michael: This is ridiculous. You’d think they’d discourage people from bringing in balloons.
Darryl: Hey, I think this guy playing Sweeney Todd is my plumber.
Michael: No, Darryl. This guy’s a world-class actor. He doesn’t daylight as your plumber.
Darryl: No, it’s my plumber. Says so in his bio. Apparently the director discovered him doing karaoke. It’s his first play, he didn’t even audition.

Darryl: If we don’t listen to the overture, we won’t recognize the musical themes when they come back later.

Andy: I feel you, Johanna.

Dwight: I work with that guy.

Dwight: Why are you dressed like a seed catalog model?

Pam: It’s fun to hear Andy sing in the appropriate setting.

Jim: Let’s get our Sweeney on.

Andy: Just checking my emails. See if I got any last minute “break a leg”s or “I still love you”-type texts. Doesn’t look like I got anything. Maybe on my Facebook wall.

Creed: Unfortunately in this ham-fisted production of Sweeney Todd, the real terror comes from the vocal performances. New paragraph.

Sweeney Todd: There’s a little bird fluttering around. Do hope it ceases chirping.

Andy: Oh, it appears the bird was in mine own pocket this whole time. He’s gone to sleep now, I’ve closed his beak.

Andy: That’s really irresponsible of Erin. She’s a terrible babysitter.

Erin: But why would I take her to the hospital?

Jim: We’re never leaving the house again.
Pam: Not together.

Angela: That was more horrifying than Nunsense.

Dwight: All that singing got in the way of some perfectly good murders.

Darryl: This plumber has pipes.

Creed: Be cool, Michael. I saw this guy kill a bunch of people.

Andy: These would have been your seats. Best seats in the house. Lots of people think it would be the front row, but actually, right here, this is where the speakers converge, and the sound just, like, nails you right here.

Jim: It’s like The Hurt Locker.

Pam: Let’s get our juice on!

Michael: Oscar, enough with the sass! Please!

Michael: I booed someone tonight. I have no filter.

Michael: I thought you were exactly awesome. No better, no worse.

Michael: In the criminal justice system, the people are represented by two separate but equally important groups: the police who investigate the crimes and the district attorneys who prosecute the offenders. These are their stories. I’m just a cleaning lady. Ahhhh! Dead body! He wrapped his belt around his own neck. It looks like a classic case of auto-erotic asphyxiation. Yeah, looks like everyone’s tightening their belts in this economy. Last time you saw the victim, was he happy? Last time I saw this john, he wasn’t a victim, if you know what I’m talking about.

Icon provided by pessimistreader.