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Writer: Paul Lieberstein, Director: Greg Daniels
Summary (NBC): After Jan busts Michael’s “movie Monday,” an upset Angela pushes Dwight into making a play for Michael’s job. Pam internet shops and has a fashion show at lunch.
The Office The Coup Trivia
The Office The Coup quotes
Michael: The only cure I know for the Monday blues is “Varsity Blues.”
Pam: Movie Monday started with training videos. But we went through those pretty fast. Then we watched a medical video. Since then, it’s been half-hour installments of various movies, with the exception of an episode of Entourage, which Michael made us watch six times.
Angela: I don’t approve of Movie Monday. I don’t.
Michael: Hi Jan! Hope you brought the Milk Duds!
Jan: How would a movie increase productivity, Michael? How on earth would it do that?
Michael: People work faster after.
Michael: No, they have to, to make up for the time they lost, watching the movie.
Dwight: Ever since Michael dumped Jan for Carol, Jan’s been bitching out on him. Reject a woman, and she will never let it go. One of the many defects of their kind. Also, weak arms.
Angela: Fine! Sit back and do nothing and let us all get fired!
Angela: I know that patience and loyalty are good and virtuous traits. But sometimes I just think you need to grow a pair.
Jim: At the Stamford branch, they all play this World War II video game called Call of Duty, and they’re all really into it. I’m told it started as a team building exercise. Unfortunately I really suck at it. We didn’t play many video games in Scranton. Instead, we’d do stuff like uh, Pam and I would sometimes hum the same high-pitched note, and try to get Dwight to make an appointment with an ear doctor. And uh, Pam called it Pretendinitis.
Kelly: Fashion show, fashion show, fashion show at lunch!
Jim: Wait, are we playing teams?
Jan: You should talk to Michael, and he’ll talk to me, and that way, we don’t have to speak to each other.
Jan: It’s not about a surprise party, is it?
Dwight: No, but we should discuss that another time.
Dwight: There is a Liz Claiborne outlet. I know you like that store. Go inside and shop until I can meet you.
Jan: How do you know I like that store?
Dwight: Many of your blouses are Claibornes.
Jan: How do you know that?
Dwight: It’s part of my job.
Jan: No, it’s not. It’s officially not.
Dwight: I’m going to the dentist.
Dwight: I have to have an emergency crown put in.
Dwight: Yes. It’s a new dentist, he’s far, I might be gone … three hours.
Michael: Three hours, wow. Have fun.
Dwight: Didja get anything good?
Dwight: New blouse? Halter top? Camisole? Teddy?
Dwight: I could save the branch.
Dwight: If you let me run it.
Dwight: Okay I can run it?
Dwight: So … here we are. It’s all on the table.
Dwight: Oh, by the way, there’s a new Ann Taylor outlet store near here. I know you like their earrings.
Jan (thinks for a minute): Where is it?
Michael: What? You were at the dentist?
Michael: What was Dwight thinking? That he could turn Jan against me? She’s my ex-lover … ish.
Kelly: Isn’t that like your third soda today?
Andy: The saboteur! Saboteur. I’m going to kill you for real. This game, the game is over. I’m really going to shoot you.
Michael: Hey Dwight. Want an M&M?
Michael: What’s his name?
Michael: Your dentist’s name is Crentist.
Michael: I’m glad you’re okay.
Michael: Business is like a jungle. And I am like a tiger. And Dwight is like a monkey, that stabs the tiger in the back with a stick. Does the tiger fire the monkey? Does the tiger transfer the monkey to another branch. (Smiles) Pun. There is no way of knowing what goes on inside the tiger’s head. We don’t have the technology.
Dwight: Well, gosh … if you think I should, then I will.
Dwight: I can’t imagine this place without you.
Michael: Can’t you. That’s so nice.
Dwight: When I’m ready, Mike. Okay, let’s do it!
Michael: You might think that I am kidding, and I understand that.
Angela: Congratulations, Dwight.
Dwight: Thank you, Angela.
Dwight: I just want to say, to the few of you who will remain under my employ, that I intend to lead you into the black with ferocity.
Pam: I have this little vacuum cleaner that’s broken. If Dwight doesn’t work out, maybe that could be manager.
Phyllis: Maybe I’ll quit.
Angela: We can make a difference here.
Dwight: I will make a difference here.
Angela: You alone? Cause I thought together, we were …
Dwight: Oh please, don’t be naive. You can be in charge of the women.
Karen: Look how cute he is. He’s trying to shoot with a smoke grenade.
Jim: Wow. Psych-o-path.
Creed: I’m just looking.
Pam: Please go back to your desk.
Creed: In a minute.
Pam: Well I remember why I dress the way I do at work. But I’m going to keep the clothes. I mean, it’ll just be cool to have some after-work clothes that aren’t pajamas.
Dwight: I’m thinking about getting something German, something with decent gas mileage. Plus the convertible is a ridiculous choice for this climate.
Michael: Take it back.
Michael: That’s my car. THAT’S MY CAR!
Michael: I have a laundry machine.
Michael: Get up. And you can hug it out, bitch.
Michael: Hug it out, bitch. That is what men say to each other after a fight. They hug it out, and in doing so, they just let it go. And walk away when they’re done. Not a good idea to say that to a woman, however, I have found. Doesn’t translate.
Michael: Yup, yup, we hugged it out. But, it turns out I was still a little angry. So I felt I needed to punish him just a little bit more, and I’m making him do my laundry for a year.
Icon courtesy lidi.