The Office: The Seminar, 7.14

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The Office: The Seminar

Writer: Steve Hely, Director: B.J. Novak

Summary (NBC): With Andy’s sales at his lowest ever, he gets desperate and holds a small business seminar with the help of some special guests. Michael and Holly turn the event into an improv challenge. Meanwhile, Erin enlists some of her co-workers in her scrabble battle with Gabe. Guest cameo: Ricky Gervais.

The Office The Seminar trivia

The Office The Seminar rating

In a poll conducted January 27-31, 2011, Tallyheads rated this episode: 7.05/10

See all The Office Season 7 ratings.

The Office The Seminar quotes

Michael: I’m working on an English character. It’s called Reginald Pooftah.

Michael: People don’t understand that it has nothing to do with making fun of a different nationality.

David Brent: Comedy is a place where the mind goes to tickle itself. That’s what she said!

Michael: The character, Mikanos, is just a little added flavor. Mikanos is loosely based on another character I do, Spiros. Who is more about the ladies.

Andy: Thank you so much, Tuna Turner.

Andy: I get super flexible when I’m nervous.

Andy: If the seminar was a meal, you’d be the amuse bouche.

Seminar guy: My company will act as an intermedium for like, .2 cents off every transaction.

Dwight: You promised us whales, these are worms!

Andy: They’re baby whales, which is even cuter!

Michael: Too much information? That’s what I thought. But you know what? Here I am using it.

Erin: Is “jlp” a word? Like “I jlp you!”

Erin: So far I’ve seen “The Shining,” “Rosemary’s Baby,” “The Ring”… not really my thing. Although I do like the early parts of the movies where they have a perfect family and everything.

Oscar: You could have hit “mood.” Would have played a triple word.
Erin: Like “the cow mood yesterday.”

Pam: You know It doesn’t just have to be cow stuff, right?

Kevin: I’m no Jim. The only way that I’m Jim is in the movie version, when Jim sees what his future would be like if he never met Pam.

Ryan: I don’t like committing to things just like that.

Andy: My name’s Andy Bernard, but you can call me the Nard Dog.

Kevin: There are some people who have charm, and some people who don’t. Guess which type I am. Charm type.

Kevin: What I want you to do is dream the biggest that you can, and then, double it!

Kelly: Who am I? I’m Kelly Kapoor. The Business Bitch.

Kelly: It is important to brand yourself. So I have a couple of things in the works. The Business Bitch, The Diet Bitch, The Shopping Bitch, The Etiquette Bitch.

Professor Scott Powell: Hey, Kelly Kapoor. What a delicious surprise.

Andy: That brilliant little bitch.

Oscar: Put the “Q” there, sweetie.

Pam: You could have just told us what you were thinking.
Oscar: There’s no theater in that.
Pam: There’s no yelling in that, either.

Holly: What do you do in your spare time?
Michael: Practice Olympics!

Michael: She will have a greekacino.

Michael: I can’t believe it! She can talk!
Holly: No more brain damage!

Creed: Two eyes, two ears, a chin, a mouth, ten fingers, two nipples, a butt, two kneecaps, a penis. I’ve just described to you the Loch Ness Monster. And the reward for its capture? All the riches in Scotland. So I have one question: why are you here?

Gabe: I picked out our movie. It’s called “Suspiria.”

Erin: When I win, we’re going to watch “Wall-E,” where all the boundaries of color are pushed.

Darryl: They’re a bunch of jackals. They left you in the lurch. And if they want to jump in, it means you’re almost there. You did this. Bring it home.

Oscar: I will have apoplexy if you lose.

Erin: I played “ape.”

Michael: I like you. I’m going to give you my secret gyro recipe.

Jim: My mom thinks you’re too dumb to hang out with.

Andy: The rest of you are dead to me. You made the stupidest decisions of your life.

Tom Witochkin: Where’s your jet pack, Zuckerberg?

Andy: I guess when you looked in me, you forgot about my balls. They’re on the outside. Don’t know how you missed them.

Michael: Come to me, Necropolis. Put your lips on my lips.

Erin: There’s a ‘Shrek 2’?!

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