The Office: The Whale, 9.07

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The Office: The Whale

Writer: Carrie Kemper, Director: Rodman Flender

Summary (NBC): Dwight faces his greatest professional handicap: selling to women — when Dwight must sell to a woman at the lucrative Scranton White Pages, Pam and the ladies teach him how to interact with female clients. Angela suspects the Senator is cheating on her; she and Oscar spy on him at his yoga class. Meanwhile, Andy skypes in from his boat, and Toby convinces several guys in the office to grow mustaches in honor of “Movember.” Guest stars: Jack Coleman, Melora Hardin.

The Office The Whale extras

The Office The Whale rating

In a poll conducted November 15-19, 2012, Tallyheads rated this episode: 8.41/10

See all The Office Season 9 ratings.

The Office The Whale quotes

Andy: Worry about my eyes. They’re like two flaming meatballs in my skull.

Erin: No Woman No Cry.

Darryl: Andy, it’s Darryl. Take your drawers off your head.

Dwight: There is a reason we in the paper industry call this thing “The White Whale.” Look at all that sweet blubber.

Dwight: Will you run into the bathroom and tell him to eat it?

Phyllis: Pizza Friday could come back.

Creed: I miss Clinton.

Jim: First time I’ve ever been excited about work. So that feels… wrong.

Pete: Okay, calm down. It’s just me. Not Tom Selleck.

Clark: I hope you like being turned on all the time.

Toby: I have very fertile hair glands.

Toby: We have the dopest time back in the annex.

Toby: Smile if you love men’s prostates.

Angela: I think the senator is having an affair.

Pam: You got this, Schrute.

Dwight: I will tell her what her needs are and then fill them.

Nellie: Have you ever killed a woman? How many women have you killed? Please, sir, will you not kill me?

Colin: It’s sounding kind of spooky sexy over here, Halpert.

Colin: We’re trying to reach Jim Halpert, not Batman.

Dwight: Unfortunately, our external hairs don’t vibrate at all.

Erin: It’s just up and down. Just a regular nod, like a person.

Nellie: He looks like he’s laboring over a stool, having just eaten human flesh.

Meredith: Boo! Weird!

Pam: Ten years ago, I didn’t care if Dwight got married, or died a beet-farming bachelor. But having kids makes you so soft. I used to watch Pulp Fiction and laugh, now I’m like, “that poor gimp is somebody’s child!”

Dwight: Don’t lie about your shoulders!

Pam: Business women are just normal, nice, reasonable people.

Pam: He used to make dogs fight, or he actually fought dogs?
Dwight: A little of this, a little of that.

Angela: I’ve heard of this. Dog style.

Hank: This. Ends. Now!

Jan: Fine. I will show you one slideshow.

Erin: It makes it look like there’s an eyebrow in the middle of your face. Makes your mouth look like an eye socket. You look like a Cyclops whose eye fell out.

Jan: Don’t patronize me.
Pam: I’m so sorry. I hate this. You’re better.

Clark: Where’s the Quiznos?
Dwight: You’re the Quiznos.

Jan: And yes. Molly is crap.

Jan: Do you have a valid passport?

Dwight: You are my friend. And you are a woman. And women love gossip. It’s like air to you people.

Icon provided by pessimistreader.


  1. Ed Helms has been filming Hangover 3 for the last month or so, so maybe that’s why Andy’s away on a boat in this one. Sounds like this is going to be a Pam & Dwight episode – I love those! Can’t wait to see who has mustaches as well!

  2. Sounds promising! @vic, agree with you, glad we can look forward to a reduced Andy role in this episode

    On another note, if interviews are true, and the next episode is “The Farm”, that puts the episodes at
    The Boat
    The Whale
    The Farm
    Quite a lot of ‘the’s

  3. I don’t really buy Dwight being unable to sell to women. Remember when he picked up the female basketball player in Night Out? It always seemed that Dwight could have women wrapped around his finger but he just chose not to. Maybe that’s the point of the storyline.

  4. First Broccoli Rob via satellite and now Andy via Skype! Ed Helms is filming Hangover 3 at the moment, right?

  5. @Kayla – We’ve seen him sell himself. “How would I describe myself? Three words. Hard-working. Alpha male. Jackhammer. Merciless. Insatiable.”

  6. Kayla – we saw him try to sell to the blond at the “Valentines Party” in Blood Drive (Season 5)

  7. oh yeah…

    Dwight: So basically, the greater volume you decide to buy in, the greater discount we can give you.
    Blonde: OK. [Blonde stands up to leave]
    Dwight: OK, what’s up?
    Blonde: Look, I’m gonna go…
    Dwight: Oh-oh-oh before you go, I’d just love to get a firm commitment on this. You know maybe sign–
    Blonde: Look, we already have a paper supplier.
    Dwight: OK. Well, thanks for wasting my time tonight, idiot. God!

    excited to see dwight try again :)

  8. I wonder if it’s the same sailboat Andy was talking about his brother getting last season when Pam, Angela, and Oscar were competing over what’s harder to care for, one baby, two babies, or a dog.

  9. Does anyone else here think like I do, in that we’re going to see an Angela/Oscar “duel” over the Senator like we did between Andy and Dwight over Angela? Or perhaps there will be a different take on it? Maybe while spying on him with Angela, Oscar sees that he’s not the only man in the Senator’s life. Which leaves Oscar, who claims he might be in love for the first time in his now middle aged life, devastated; and Angela angry, embarrassed, foolish, and most likely a soon to be single mother–something she’s always openly disparaged. In a way, both get their comeuppance: For past duplicities and hypocritical, judgmental ways. And it furthermore shows that as opposite as they appear on the surface of things, at the core, they’re really the same sort of person.

  10. Dwight has to sell Dunder Mifflin paper to Jan, who was humiliated & fired by David Wallace? And Pam is there to lend Dwight support? After Jim stole Jan’s Hunter CD? What a set-up! Jan will filet Dwight and coldly remind Pam to dress for the job that she wants, not the one that she has.

  11. I thought it was a perfect blend of old and new Office. I’m glad Andy’s out of the office for a while because it seems that the writers are putting focus where it needs to be. I hope when he comes back they still keep his role to a minimum. Ayways, this episode was PERFECTION.

  12. Jack Coleman in a black tank top? Those arms? YES. *votes like whoa*

    Also, it’s kind of poetic that Angela now knows and this is all Oscar’s fault.

  13. Wow. Jan, Hank and Wallace all in an episode, with the little Crazy Jan montage–felt like old times. I daresay if this type of thing keeps happening, The Office might be finally back.

    Angela/Oscar was good, Dwight/Pam was great, the Jim stuff left a lot of things nicely open, and it was good for Andy to have his communication with us fall into the sea before the opening. Andy was always good as part of the ensemble–let’s end as an ensemble.

    Michael was the only one who could be a lead on the show, and let’s leave it that way. (Hope he gets his return this season too–that would be great symmetry, like it’s been with the other guests this year.)

  14. Good episode. I loved the Pam/Dwight/Jan story line, it’s good to see that Jan is as crazy as ever. I just hope Jim doesn’t go to Philly, I am sick of them having Jim and Pam in different cities for weeks at a time.

  15. Wow! What an episode! Is Dwight Jr. gone? Jan. What else can you say? Pure greatness. While I kind of saw the wrinkle in Jim’s plans coming, I didn’t think it would hit in such a painful and awkward manner. The usually cool, knows what to do, Jim has been anything but when it comes to his new endeavor. However, when it comes to office hijinks, he still has his A game. Anytime Pam, Jim, and Dwight, in whatever configuration, come together and show warmth toward each other is a good time. Probably my favorite moments of The Office throughout the years are such moments. Both Angela and Oscar seem to be reaping what they’ve sown in the present as well as the past. And Toby, whoa. He just gets sadder and creepier with each episode. But not in an annoying way; rather we’re starting to really see why Michael couldn’t stand him. Can’t WAIT till the next episode. Does anyone else here find the way in which NBC seems to not really care that this is the last season to be odd? I sure do.

  16. @Joel — I just see the Jim stuff as leading toward their ultimate exit from Dunder Mifflin. I could definitely be wrong on that, but this season is too important to remove a main character mid-season like that. I don’t think they’d do it.

  17. @Kristen I do agree that this will probably lead to their exit from Dunder Mifflin but from the last conversation Jim and his friend had on the phone it seems like his buddy wants him in Philly sooner rather than later. While I don’t think they would just have Jim leave mid-season I could definitely see them sending him to Philly for a few weeks (Similar to Tallahassee last season)

  18. Overall, it was a great episode! Dwight and Pam make a good team, the pairing of Angela and Oscar was fun, and surprisingly, I actually enjoyed Nellie in this episode too. My one gripe is with the Jim storyline. Are you seriously saying that Jim couldn’t find a quiet place to have the call? Andy’s office? Maybe sitting inside his own car? It’s not like Jim to not have thought of these options.

  19. This season is unfolding nicely! The callbacks are sublime. Angela gets hers for doing Andy dirty in S5. Pam with Dwight like she was with Michael on his tour of the other branches. Jim is gonna have to go to ‘Art School’ (Philly) like Pam did. Crazy Jan! How much better can this season get? I can’t wait to find out!! Greg Daniels… ’nuff said.

  20. Outstanding episode!!!!! Lots of things going on. Men with moustaches, it was so great; Jim will have the same traveling experience Pam had in art school; the Jan/Dwight/Pam moment was awesome; Oscar and Angela spying on the senator, until apparently she learns from her husband’s real gender through what Oscar said; and the cold open with Andy skyping in, was amazing, too. The next episode is gonna be a thrill, when it comes to the senator’s affair.

  21. My favorite parts of this season have just been Toby. And Toby with the New guys. He was back in the annex miserable with Ryan and Kelly, and now he has people to get along with. Happy Toby is as good as Pathetic Toby.

  22. 200 words aren’t enough to express how great this episode was. One of the ones at this ranking that I haven’t seen for a while

  23. This one was pretty good. Not as good as “The Boat”, but nevertheless another solid episode. Season nine is really turning out nicely. My favorite story-line was definitely the one with Jan/Pam/Dwight; I really liked the Jan painting on the wall that looked like Warhol. Her song with the slideshow was also a highlight.

  24. I loved the Pam/Dwight and Oscar/Angela pairings. I can’t wait to see what happens next with the Senator. Jim’s storyline was a bit silly though. He could just have used Andy’s empty office. It wasn’t even as if Dwight was around to cause him trouble.

  25. The Office is at its best when it’s doing big story arcs. With Jim not being able to work from Scranton, Angela finding out, and a HUGE new deal for Dunder Mifflin, I love how many stories are opening up. Very excited for the next few episodes!

  26. This episode was fantastic. Who wrote it? It was great to have Jan back, and her scenes with Pam were a highlight. But then, so were the Oscar/Angela scenes. It was a riot when he had his drawer fall out. I thought he was really given a chance to shine this time, and he made the most of it. And the women training Dwight, so funny! The whole thing had great energy and was laugh out loud funny. Best in a long time. ASTRID!

  27. Man, another disappointingly bad episode. Jan was a caricature of her former self, even though she was already becoming a caricature by the time she left around the end of season 4. It was even worse this time. I will say that I kind of enjoyed the little Toby and pals scenes about the mustaches.

  28. It’s a good time for Andy to be away from The Office. His character needs a rest. And I hope that Dwight Jr isn’t leaving The Office. He’s great!

  29. Fantastic episode — great to let Oscar Nunez show his amazing acting chops. I am a little surprised that nobody here has considered that Jim is on the outside and having his idea stolen from him by his “buddies”.

  30. Loved it! Especially the girls trying to teach Dwight how to sell – that was so perfect! I loved Angela’s expression at the end. For last week and this week, Angela Kinsey deserves a nomination.

  31. I was unspoiled for this episode, so when Pam realized that Jan was the potential client, I was so excited! What a huge, hilarious payoff that was. Loved her self-centered video montage about Astrid and all the artwork in her office. The Pam/Dwight dynamic is always a winner in my book.

    Loved Oscar/Angela storyline, too. His anxiety was priceless. He’s such a talented actor — they both are. Can’t wait to see what happens next with that story.

    Toby was so creepy and hilarious. All the stories were good. I really like it when everyone has at least one funny moment or line in the episode. Ensemble comedy at its best. :-)

  32. So many amazing story-lines…I can’t believe we have to wait 2 WEEKS to find out about Jim and his new “job”, Oscar/Angela, new-Dwight and Jan. I’m hoping Jim doesn’t lose this opportunity or move to Philly without Pam and the kids (even for a brief time). Great episode that left me wanting more!!! :)

  33. Great episode! I think Andy needed a rest, so I was happy to have a Dwight/Pam and Oscar/Angela storyline. I felt bad for Jim here, and have a bad feeling he is going to be screwed by this new company….

  34. You have to wonder why they let Melora Hardin go after the baby shower episode. The dinner party episode was one of the best black comedy works of art I’ve ever seen. (It’s sad that the show couldn’t re-create that again if they wanted.) Anyway, Jan brings tension to The Office, something that’s been lacking (at least in a genuine sense) since she left about five years ago. What a shame.

  35. I want Mora Melora! I am selfishly hoping that Jan can be on more than one episode this season. She is the best ever, and so pretty too. However, Toby stole the show for me, I am sorry but the way he acted so genuinely excited that something that TOBY FLENDERSON created was being enjoyed and so popular with all the other guys in the office was hilarious. Toby has never been “involved” or part of anything cool with the rest of his co-workers. Great all the way through.

  36. Many good parts, but my favorite line was Jan’s at the end to Clark: “Do you have a valid passport ?”

    Erin was back to her awkward self when she obeyed Dwight’s order to “run into the bathroom and tell Stanley to ‘eat it'”. Her vivid description of Pete’s mustache ? Umph, painful. No wonder he shaved it off ! And her lame reaction to Andy leaving her behind, “No woman no cry”. Oh Erin. I think (or at least hope) we’re going to see some intervening on Pam’s part to encourage her to be with the right guy.

    Really loved Phyllis’ strong presence in this one and that the writers are including more of the staff in big story lines like Angela and Oscar too.

  37. another Toby quote I liked – trying to be social – “This is fun! You know? This is fun!” i lol’ed

  38. I wonder if at some point Melora Hardin said she would appear on the show IF she could sing in the episode? She sang in the Baby Shower, in Threat Level Midnight, in this episode…can’t recall if she was in other episodes between that time. She has a lovely voice, it is just odd that there’s singing when she appears.

    The look Angela gave Oscar when it all added up was priceless! I loved everything about the Pam and Dwight interaction! The direction work to show us, at the same time Pam figures it out, that Jan was the client was excellent! I’d seen spoilers but my husband realized it at the same time as Pam and it was a great reveal! Pam was so great in this one – trying hard to be nice despite the circumstances sweet Pam we know and love.

  39. I liked the episode, but I’m really not liking Plop/Pete. I’m not an Andy/Erin shipper, but he seems like he’s there to be a) Ryan, Jr., except significantly less funny, and b) a plot device to create tension in the Andy/Erin plotline…again. I thought we all hated that the last four times it happened? Why’s it so great now?

    I agree with whoever said on this website that Peterin is not going to occur, because I interpret Daniels’ “if Pam and Jim didn’t happen” comment as Erin walking off with Andy at the finale. Not all Jims can get their semi-cheating Pams. Sad ending for A&E, at least, but The Office isn’t meant to be wish-fulfillment.

  40. Agreed Pink Dragon. Not sold on Pete yet. I am an Andy supporter, but I don’t like where his character is going this season. Still, not sold on Peterin.

  41. Loved this one, but it was painful to watch Jim not be able to figure out how to find a quiet place for a phone call. I just don’t like him written to be a nervous incompetent guy when anything doesn’t go as planned.
    Dwight and Pam made up for any mishaps though. They are just magic for me.

  42. What an episode, last weeks was great, this was even better. Special mention to Oscar and Angela, they were fantastic.

  43. My favorite scene was when Dwight told Pam “You are my friend. And, you are a woman.” I loved Pam’s warm reception to his words. Dwight’s not one to ever admit his feelings. It made him saying this to Pam truly special.

  44. I don’t get what the big deal with Jim is that he couldn’t find one quiet place to go for his phone call. In “The Seminar” he was able to duck out of the office and go to his car to call a sports radio show. What happened to the confident always-has-a-plan Jim Halpert?

  45. Thanks to Dwight, I will never think of “Gina” like “Geena”…ewww! Outstanding episode!!! I knew that Jan was coming back after that hilarious promo on The Voice – this episode lived up to its potential with Jan (We’ve missed Astrid – another name issue!) It was a perfect episode for the final season — bringing Jan back for a showdown with David — and highlighting Dwight’s skills with women — funny roleplaying. But I really loved the story line with Oscar. He and Angela played it perfectly! We re-watched the segment with Jan and with Oscar a couple of times -great lines, perfect timing! Liked the “comedy suspense” with Pam realizing it was Jan and Angela realizing…..!!!!!!!

  46. Is Jim still on the inside with David Wallace? Jim’s buddy Wallace just passed him over to give Dwight a one-of-a-kind (whale sized) sales opportunity. The Halperts could really use more money coming in about now.

  47. 67, @Michael, it’s a ‘Moby Dick’ reference. Female clients are Dwight’s “white whale”. Also, in business, really big customers are known as ‘whales’.

  48. @Michael it was called the whale because of the Scranton White Pages, “The Whale” of the paper industry as described by Dwight. The analogy refers to the book being full of blubber, or tons of pages.

  49. A week later I’m still laughing at Erin yelling at Stanley in the bathroom eat it Stanley!!!

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