The Office: The Injury, 2.12

Thursday, January 12th, 2006 | 13 comments

tfes

The Office: The Injury

W: Mindy Kaling, D: Bryan Gordon

Summary: Michael burns his foot on his George Foreman grill, and Dwight’s concussion brings out his tender side. Jim takes Dwight and Michael to the hospital, where Michael tries to mooch off of Dwight’s CAT scan.

The Office The Injury Trivia

Favorite quotes

Jim: Just say, really loudly, what happened.

Jim: You burned your foot on a Foreman grill.

Michael: I enjoy having breakfast in bed. I like waking up to the smell of bacon, sue me. And since, I don’t have a butler, I have to do it myself. So … most nights before I go to bed, I will lay six strips of bacon out on my George Foreman grill. Then I go to sleep. When I wake up, I plug in the grill. I go back to sleep again. Then, I wake up, to the smell of crackling bacon. It is delicious, it’s good for me, it’s the perfect way to start the day. Today, I got up, I stepped onto the grill, and it clamped down on my foot, that’s it. I don’t see what’s so hard to believe about that.

Kevin: Can you hop?
Michael: I tried hopping, Kevin, and I bumped my elbow against the wall, and now my elbow has a protruberance. (Note it’s really called a protuberance.)

Jim (looking out the window): Dwight … you forgot your bumper!

Michael (on the phone with no one listening): Hellllo. Please don’t send Dwight.

Pam: You missed two big conference calls today, one with corporate.
Michael: Oh, did you explain why?
Pam: No, I didn’t mention that you cooked your foot.
Michael: Burned my foot, Pam. (While Jim pops the bubblewrap wrapping Michael’s foot) Please stop popping my cast. Thank you.
Jim: So where are you shipping your foot?

Pam: It’s just that before you said you didn’t want any special treatment.
Michael: I don’t … want any special treatment, Pam. I just want you to treat me like you would, a family member who’s undergone some sort of serious physical trauma. I don’t think that’s too much to ask.
Pam: Do you want some aspirin, because you seem a little fussy.

Dwight: Pam, I am assistant regional manager, and I can take care of him. Part of my duties are to…
Michael: What? Part of your duties are to what?
Dwight: What?
Michael: You just said that part of your duties are to … something.
Dwight: No I didn’t.
Michael: Yes you did. What is wrong with you?
Dwight: What is wrong with you?

Dwight: Oh, man, is that a Prism DuroSport?
Pam: You’ve seen one of these?
Dwight: Yeah, they’re like an iPod, only they’re better. ‘Cause they’re chunkier and more solid.

Dwight: Okay, see you later, Pan.
Pam (trying to process what Dwight just said): … Pan?

Pam: What.
Michael: Come here please.
Pam: Tell me before I come there.
Michael: I want you to rub butter on my foot.
Pam: No.
Michael: Pam, please. I have Country Crock.

Jim: So … I guess Pam and Dwight are friends now.
Pam: Oh god no, Dwight isn’t my friend. (Thinks for a second) Oh my god, Dwight’s kind of my friend.

Michael: No, no, no one is helping me out at all, Mom. No, I’m not going to call Jan. She’d just worry. Drive down here and make a big thing … who told you that? No, it was mutual! What is Pam doing chatting with you?

Dwight: Hmm, you like candy?
Angela (looking nervously at the camera): It’s alright.
Dwight: Cuz you’re sweeter than candy.
Angela: What is wrong with you?
Dwight playfully spanks Angela before running away.

Toby (watching Ryan eat string cheese): Wow, you just dive right in.
Ryan: You know, around age 12, I just started going for it.

Michael: Get Ryan. (Groans) He needs to lift me, and he needs to clean me up a little bit. Bring a wet towel.
Toby: Ryan is uh … (Ryan makes neck-slitting motion) … dead.
Michael: No he’s not.
Toby: Dead.
Michael: I just saw him.
Toby (shaking head): No.

Jim: Do you think Dwight’s being a little weird today?
Pam: No. He’s actually been really nice, and helpful.
Jim: And … that isn’t weird.
Pam: Wow.

Michael: I am the only one here who has a legitimate disability. Although I’m sure Stanley has had his fair share of obstacles.
Stanley: I’m not disabled, and neither are you.
Michael: Okay… (flings crutch across room) … what does this look like to you, Stanley?
Stanley: Mailboxes Etcetera.

Michael: Imagine if you had left Stevie Wonder on the floor of that bathroom instead of me.
Phyllis: Oh … we wouldn’t. We love Stevie Wonder.

Dwight (looking up at Creed): Dad?

Billy Merchant: Sorry I’m late, somebody parked in the handicapped parking space.

Billy Merchant: I’m the properties manager of this office park.
Michael: You are so brave. You are so brave.

Michael: Let me ask you something. How longs it take for you to do something simple, everyday, like, like brush your teeth in the morning.
Billy Merchant: I don’t know, like thirty seconds?
Michael: Oh my god. That’s three times as long as it takes me.

Jim: I want to clamp Michael’s face in a George Foreman grill.

Michael: Did you see … “Born on the Fourth of July”? I was under the impression that Billy would be more like that guy.

Ryan: I found the pudding cups you wanted at a gas station in Carbondale!
Michael: You did it, look at you! And with the plate and the napkin … very nice. Thank you Ryan.
Ryan: You’re very welcome.
Michael: Did you get the yams?
Ryan: No. The gas station in Carbondale did not have fresh yams!
Michael (sighing): Ahh, okay. I’ll just have the pudding.
Ryan: You sure?
Michael: Yeah.
Ryan: Okay.
Michael (eating pudding): You know what, I feel better. Ryan brought me some chocolate pudding, and his kindness healed my foot.

Ryan: I ground up four extra-strength aspirin, and put them in Michael’s pudding. I do the same thing with my dog, to get him to take his heartworm medicine.

Pam: I just want to say goodbye, okay?
Dwight: I’ll be back. I mean …
Pam: Yes, I know, but it’s going to be different.
Dwight: Why?
Pam: It’s … just hard to explain.
Dwight: Oh Pam (flicks her nose), you’re adorable.
Pam: Oh my goodness … come here (hugs Dwight).
Dwight: Oh … huggy hugs!

Michael: The rules of shotgun are very simple and very clear: the first person to shout shotgun when you’re within the sight of the car gets the front seat. That’s how the game’s played. There are no exceptions for someone with a concussion.

Dwight: Where are we going?
Jim: We’re going to Chuck E. Cheese.
Michael: Chuck E. Cheese? Oh god, I’m so sick of Chuck E. Cheese.
Jim: We’re going to the hospital Michael.
Michael: I know. Just sayin’ …

Michael: Give me the bottle or you’re fired!
Dwight: You can’t fire me, I don’t work in this van!

Michael (filling out form): Dwight, what is your middle name?
Dwight: Danger.
Michael: Something with a k …
Jim: It’s Kurt. Wow, I’m so sad that I know that.

Doctor: Does the skin look red or swollen …
Dwight (smirking at the camera): That’s what she said.

Pages: 1 2

13 comments


  1. 1. Helen  

    TO EVERYONE ON “THE OFFICE”, I love your show so much, I can hardly wait until Thursday night!!! I was really sad when I didn’t see your show last week.

    I think that the show about “the Injury” was one of the best shows I have ever seen.

    When Dwight hit that pole and then threw up, I could not quite laughing. I am not heartless, in fact I have a very caring and loving heart. But that was so funny!!!
    Keep us laughing and crying [from laughing] love, Helen


  2. 2. James  

    the injury is the BEST episode of the best show ever – bar none – period – end of discussion – case closed – under the bridge – lights out – move along – sold out – good night


  3. 3. Michelle  

    I am thinking about carrying a plant mister in my van just because of this episode. It obviously has so many previously unforseen uses that it seems like taking fate into your own hands to leave home without one.

    Best episode. Ever. Turned me from casual fan into obsessive geek.


  4. 4. Mary  

    I just discovered this site but wanted to say this is my favorite episode of all time. I was laughing so hard I almost threw up. My brother called while I was watching it and I was trying to tell him about the episode and I was laughing so hard I couldn’t talk.


  5. 5. Kacie  

    This has to be, by far, the best office episode i’ve seen. We quote it all the time.

    Michael: Let me ask you something. How longs it take for you to do something simple, everyday, like, like brush your teeth in the morning.
    Billy Merchant: I don’t know, like thirty seconds?
    Michael: Oh my god. That’s three times as long as it takes me

    Michael: I don’t…want any special treatment, Pam. I just want you to treat me like you would, a family member who’s undergone some sort of serious physical trauma. I don’t think that’s too much to ask

    Country Crock!

    Michael: Chuck E. Cheese? Oh god, I’m so sick of Chuck E. Cheese.

    Michael (filling out form): Dwight, what is your middle name?
    Dwight: Danger

    Billy Merchant : What was wrong with that guy?
    Jim:Oh Michael? Today? He hurt his foot.
    Billy: Not him the moonfaced kid

    But the best of all is when Dwight is getting a cat scan or whatever and Michael sicks his foot in. Priceless.


  6. 6. Nancy  

    So so funny…… Dwight is awesome. Watching him throw up on the car then getting right in like nothing happened. I love Jim squirting them in the van…. I could not stop laughing…….. I love how Jim looks at the camera. His expressions are great.


  7. 7. Sarah  

    can’t believe this one wasn’t on here yet…
    Jim: Quick question, why is Tom hanks on the wall?
    Ryan: Twice.
    Michael: Good question. Forest Gump, mentally challenged. Philadelphia, AIDS.
    Kevin: I think that’s from Big
    Michael: I don’t think so, no.
    Kelly: Yeah, he’s dancing on a piano with Robert Loggia.
    Michael: He grew into a man overnight. Rare disability, still works.


  8. 8. Katrina  

    My favorite episode. Every time I watch it I’m reduced to tears. I EFFING LOVE THE OFFICE!


  9. 9. Dwigt  

    This is the the best episode yet.

    “I wrote ‘Bringing someone to the hospital.'”


  10. 10. CoolGuyPaul  

    How are there only 9 comments on this one?? It is my favorite episode of all time. is absolutely perfect!!!

    Only Michael would burn his foot on a George Foreman grill. Brilliant.
    Dwight calling Pam Pan is probably one of my favorite Office moments ever.

    Spray bottle in the van, it smells like chicken soup, the gas station in Carbondale did not have fresh yams, i have country crock. So many great moments.
    BEST. EPISODE. EVER.


  11. 11. Deepak Patwardhan  

    Yes, all the quotes are very funny. But, I believe that perhaps the funniest was missed. It was something like this :

    Billy Merchant : I don’t even notice it (the wheelchair) any more.
    Michael : They notice it. That’s the first thing they saw when you rolled in.

    :-)..rolled in. So, that’s the first thing Michael saw.


  12. 12. Jessica  

    This is my favorite episode of The Office. It is absolutely hilarious, and I laugh out loud crazily when I see it! It was written and acted out wonderfully- kudos to all you people from The Office. i love you!

    I am currently writing a story on fanfiction.net based on this episode of The Office. It is THAT inspiring!!

    I love THE INJURY!!!!!!!


  13. 13. DonovanInfinity  

    This is the episode that got me hooked on this show. Once Michael said “Please stop popping my cast,” I was sold.

  • Advertisement


  • Welcome

    Welcome to OfficeTally, the top fansite for NBC's hit comedy, 'The Office.'

  • The Office Store

    • The Office The Complete Series DVD
  • OfficeTally on Twitter

  • Search