Writer: B.J. Novak, Director: Dennie Gordon
Summary: Jan leads a women’s seminar and quickly learns that the ladies at the Scranton branch have aspirations very different from her own.
The Office Boys and Girls extras
- Read more about Boys and Girls in Angela’s MySpace blog and Jenna’s TV Guide blog!
- Read James’ Northern Attack recap.
The Office Boys and Girls quotes
Michael: What’s more important than quality? Equality.
Dwight: It’s a terrible idea.
Jim: What is?
Dwight: Them, in there all together. They stay in there too long, they’re going to get on the same cycle. Wreak havoc on our plumbing.
Michael: Toby, come on over. You’re a guy … too … sort of.
Michael: Why can’t boys play with dolls? Why does society force us to use urinals, when sitting down is far more comfortable?
Michael: Managing the warehouse is a very important part of my job. And I haven’t been there in months.
Dwight: Remember on Lost? When they met The Others?
Michael: Darryl is actually the foreman here, and not Roy, which is cool…there’s Roy, riding the big rig … um so Roy is actually going to be marrying Pam sometime this summer, and she’s our receptionist, sort of a Brangelina thing.
Michael: Brangelina is the Brad Pitt and Angelina …
Roy: I don’t understand.
Michael: Roy … Roy and Pam, it’s a Ram. It’s a Ram thing.
Kevin: I bet Roy heard about you liking Pam. I bet he’ll try to beat you up.
Jim: Thanks for the heads up, Kev.
Kevin: I got your back if he does. But try to stay out of it.
Michael: You may look around, and see two groups here. White collar, blue collar. But I don’t see it that way. You know why not? Because I am collar-blind.
Meredith: Hi, I’m Meredith and I’m an al … good at supplier relations.
Pam: I don’t know how I fit in with these women.
Roy: Glad she has a friend at work that she can get through the day with, she’s not all blah blah blah when she gets home …
Jim: Yeah, I like talking to her too.
Meredith: In five years, I’d like to be five years sober. Four and a half.
Kelly: I’ll tell you one thing. I am not going to be one of those women schlepping her kids around in a minivan.
Jan: Great! Uh huh.
Kelly: I want an SUV. With three rows of seats.
Jan (in interview): Well I’ll be honest, one of the goals of these womens’ seminars is to feel out if there’s any standouts, women who could be a valuable addition to our corporate life.
Dwight: Michael wants us to bond, so we need topics for conversation.
Ryan: How ’bout rainbows?
Darryl: We’re the ones that gotta clean that up!
Pam: I always dreamed of a house with a terrace upstairs.
Jan: There are always a million reasons not to do something.
Michael: What is our beef, as human men.
Warehouse guy: Now that’s a good question, Hasselhoff.
Phyllis: I’m excited about today. I love girl talk.
Angela: I’m not gaining anything from this seminar. I’m a professional woman. The head of accounting. I’m in the healthiest relationship in my life. I just think it’s insulting that Jan thinks we need this. And apparently, judging from her outfit, Jan aspires to be a whore.
Kevin: That sucks so hard.
Dwight: Yeah, and then they make you drive them to church the next morning. Like gas ain’t free!
Darryl: You don’t feel us.
Michael (to Pam, while he’s trying to talk to Jan): Can I help you?
Stanley: This here is a run-out-the-clock situation. Just like upstairs.
Pam: We watched a video about our changing bodies.
Michael (as he’s pouring out a gigantic bag of styrofoam peanuts onto Darryl’s head): Happy New Year, Darryl! Hey Darryl, you ever done this?
Jan: Okay, let’s take five. I think we could all use five.
Kelly: How can someone so beautiful be so sad?
Pam: Dreams are just that. They’re dreams. They help get you through the day. Like the thing about the terrace. It’s nice. But, um … I don’t know. It was just something I read in this book when I was 12. Uh, the girl in the book has a terrace outside of her bedroom. And she planted flowers on it. And I just loved that. Just always kind of stuck with me.
Jim: So you’re not doing it.
Pam: How did you know?
Jim: Why not?
Pam: Just, like, no big reason. Just a bunch of little reasons.
Pam: Roy’s right, there’s no guarantee it’s going to lead to anything anyway.
Jim: Roy said that.
Pam: What. You have something you want to say?
Jim: You gotta take a chance on something sometime, Pam. I mean, do you want to be a receptionist here, always?
Pam: Oh excuse me, I’m fine with my choices.
Jim: You are?
Pam (in interview): It’s impractical, I’m not going to try to get a house like that. Um, they don’t even make houses like that in Scranton. So I’m never gonna … (breaks down in tears).
Michael: Do black people like pizza?
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