The Office: Ultimatum, 7.13
Thursday, January 20th, 2011 | 172 comments
W: Carrie Kemper, D: David Rogers
Summary (NBC): Michael prepares himself for the good or bad news about Holly and her boyfriend. Pam decides to put up a resolution board for everyone to post their New Year’s resolutions. Meanwhile, Michael calls for a counseling session with Holly. Guest star: Amy Ryan.
Icon provided by pessimistreader.
The Office Ultimatum trivia
- Promos
- A behind-the-scenes clip.
- Do the Knights of the Knight look like Devo?
- In Michael’s happy celebration scene, he dances to Kelly Clarkson’s My Life Would Suck Without You.
- The “light as a croissant” e-reader Darryl buys is a Kobo.
- The song that Darryl, Andy, and Dwight roller skate to is Rose Royce’s Born to Love You.
- The Dave Matthews Band song that Andy roller skates to is “Ants Marching.”
- In an interview with Screen Junkies, Ed Helms says: “We shot at this roller rink out in the valley and I was so insanely sore the next day. You’re right, it’s one of those things you don’t do in 20 years and it hurts.”
Rating
In a poll conducted January 20-24, 2011, Tallyheads rated this episode: 7.82/10
The Office Ultimatum quotes
Quotes manually transcribed by tanster :)
Dwight: Knights of the Night are volunteer crime patrollers. One of our many recent good deeds? We set out to capture the Scranton Strangler. Mission accomplished. Not by us.
Michael: January 3, 2011. A day which will live infamously. Holly Partridge Flax, otherwise known as Holly, otherwise otherwise known as a living, breathing angel, is engaged to another man.
Michael: Today will either be the best or the worst day of my life.
Michael: If she’s engaged, I’m going to go crazy, and I’m going to start attacking people. If she’s not engaged, in all honesty, I may just burn this whole place to the ground out of happiness. Either way, I am going to need some talking down. And nobody talks me down like myself in a video talking me down.
Michael: I was just thinking about snot.
Pam: Da da da da da! A resolution board.
Dwight: Wow, did your baby draw that?
Angela: The glitter is blinding.
Phyllis: I know Sue. She’s not that great. And you know her husband’s in a wheelchair, right?
Erin: Sponge.
Michael: Sad. To soak up my tears.
Erin: Gummi bears and gummi worms.
Michael: Bears sad, worms happy. C’mon, Erin!
Michael: Two front row center to Paula Poundstone, live in Poughkeepsie.
Erin: I’m really excited for Michael either way. Because if Holly chooses to be with him, he will be so, so happy. And if not, he’ll be avoiding the biggest mistake of his life!
Dwight: You want me to crank the thermostat to 90? Smoke her out?
Kevin: Hey, right back at you, bitch!
Michael: Michael dance-off!
Dwight: I’ve achieved plenty, and there’s no better than the best.
Pam: Well maybe you’ll meet someone.
Andy: No, some people just don’t meet someone.
Andy: This is not a pity party. It’s not a party at all. It’s just sad.
Dwight: My resolution is: meet a loose woman.
Darryl: Hey, what book is that? Cool, let’s hang out tonight. Sex already? Whoa.
Darryl: My resolution is to read more. And if someone else is driving me to the bookstore, I can eat my PB&J in the car. 2011 is coming up all Darryl.
Michael: Reese’s Pieces.
Holly: Reese’s Pieces?
Kelly: Oh god, please stop!
Michael: Do you think she’s already dating a different A.J.?
Darryl: So light, like a croissant.
Darryl: That’s porn. Pornography. Old lady, nasty porn.
Phyllis: You didn’t break up with A.J. at all? Not even for a week to make him buy you a present?
Dwight: I’m tired of being Mr. Perfect Role Model all the time.
Darryl: The day shift at a strip club? You can’t unsee that.
Darryl: We’re going skating.
Erin: My goal was to learn a new word every single day. And I must say, that it is going immensely.
Creed: I want to do a cartwheel. But real casual-like and not enough to make a big deal out of it. But I know everybody saw it. Just one stunning, gorgeous cartwheel.
Michael: I made a resolution to floss, and I did it! 12:01, January 1st, bam! Blood everywhere.
Kevin: Not all of us are Michael Freaking Scott.
Michael: You’re just going to somersault around for the rest of your life?
Michael: You know what’s going to be on your tombstone? “Loser.”
Creed: My tombstone’s already made, thank you.
Kelly: Why are you eating stem first?
Kevin: This is a new food for me, how else should I eat it?
Oscar: The other way.
Kevin: Can I get some Cheez Whiz? Or hollandaise?
Kevin: Okay, I ate the fluffy part. Can I be done?
Kevin: It was traumatizing, Michael. I wouldn’t be surprised if I never ate a vegetable again.
Michael: You loom so large in my heart, that I crossed the line.
Creed: I don’t think I’m there yet boss.
Andy: Dave Matthews Band. No hits. Deep tracks only.
Kevin: Hey Ryan, how’s your fart project coming?
Ryan: Hey was it me or you that just shoved the butt end of a pound of broccoli into my mouth because Michael told me to?
Kelly: My New Year’s resolution was to get more attention.
Darryl: Did you meet someone?
Andy: Yeah, I did actually. His name is Andy. And he rollerskates like a Greek god. And you know what? I kinda like hanging out with him.
Darryl: Right on, son.
Michael: I never want to make Holly cry again. Unless it’s from laughing too hard or making love too beautifully.
Holly: We’re going to be just fine. You know how you say something over and over and the words start to sound weird? Going to be just fine, just fine, just fine, just fine…
The Office New Year’s resolutions
- Pam: drink less caffeine
- Andy: learn to cook for one
- Jim: bike more
- Angela: make time for romance! (with the senator)
- Dwight: meet a loose woman
- Darryl: read more
- Kelly: get more attention by any means necessary
- Ryan: live life like it’s an art project
- Creed: do a cartwheel
- Meredith: two cigarettes a day
- Erin: learn a new word every day
- Kevin: eat more vegetables
- Michael: floss
- Holly: cross train
- Phyllis: yoga lessons with Bob
- Oscar: finish the living room
Follow OfficeTally
Upcoming Episodes
- Season 9 schedule tbd...
Current Episodes
- May 10:
Free Family Portrait Studio - Watch 'The Office' online
- The Office Episode List
- Nielsen ratings | Fan ratings
- The Office seasons:
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9
- May 10:
Quick Links
Get Stuff
OfficeTally Exclusives
Advertisement
Archives
Categories
@163 i believe they are
Hmmm… I SO didn’t notice Jim was only in the cold open, not in the actual episode at all, until I saw people mention it on here.
I know John Krasinski is going to be in the movie “Something Borrowed”, coming out this May… I wonder if that’s what caused his absence?
PS- SO excited for that movie:)
I am going to miss Michael Scott!!!!!!
I also wanted to point out that if you look through the door in the bookstore scene you can see big green trees blowing in the background. January in Pennsylvania?! I must say I was a bit disappointed when seeing this since ‘The Office’ is usually on top of these little details. Still one of my favorite episodes though!
I just watched the episode for my 3rd time! I LOVE IT! Best part for me was easily Kevin eating the broccoli. I thought I was going to wet myself!
Stanley’s resolution is in the bottom right corner. It is to be a better husband and boyfriend! Haha!
Awesome Episode, Way to come back strong guys!!!
Loved the Andy, Darryl, Dwight trio, and I really hope we get to see more of that in future episodes.
But I do have a question, Where was Jim?
I missed Jim’s involvement in this one and would’ve loved to know what his New Year’s Resolution was.
I saw Stanley in this episode…(at least I think i did). I don’t think he said anything….I think he just shot a quick glance at Andy during the Resolution part….
I feel like they had to cut too much from this episode due to time issues. It should have been a super sized one. I hope Jim’s back next week. I missed him!
Anyone know if Carrie Kemper the writer is related to Ellie Kemper who plays Erin? It doesn’t say on IMDB.
I liked the episode, I was reminded that aside from Dwight; Kevin is the other person who has liked Michael from the early days to now. I liked the Michael Scott dance-off, and of course I liked his apology to Holly. And like many I didn’t realize Jim was gone until much later, and it didn’t bother cause at least he’ll still be there next year unlike my favorite character.
Worst episode of the season, in my opinion. What’s with all of the swearing this season? It’s like as the season goes along, the different writers are replacing creativity with swearing and the increasingly-frequent penis mentions. After a promising start to the season, The Office has gone horribly, horribly off-track.
I don’t know if I even saw Stanley on the board. If so my guess would be he just decided this resolution frenzy was nonsense he didn’t want to have any real part in. (It would fit his character and what facial reactions we saw of him)
I guess this is odd to admit, but I didn’t even think about Jim being gone until I went online. Now that he actually has Pam, and a baby, Jim is in some ways not that interesting of a character to me. Pam has more in the way of dreams, schemes, and insecurities.
I was disappointed in this episode, too. There were a few times I laughed out loud (Michael: “This phone is indestructable!”), but like others have said, it seemed disjointed. Creed seemed to be behaving in a manner different than the one we’ve come to know. Maybe a re-watch would do me good.
@TheOfficeROCKS Jim wasn’t played down, except the cold open he wasn’t in the episode at all. Scheduling conflict i guess.
Close — Gabe’s resolution was, ‘Be less squeamish around people’s dogs and babies” (presumably; it actually looked like ‘babes’).
The sequence where Kevin fake farts, then real farts, then Erin does the cartwheel followed by Creed swearing at her was so funny and weird that I had to watch it twice.
Also, Andy skating by himself to Ants Marching was priceless. This episode was kind of odd, but I enjoyed it. I didn’t notice missing Jim, which makes me feel guilty since he’s my boyfriend.
Woops, I just re-watched it and I also saw him at his desk while everyone was chasing Holly, but I had to look for him I didn’t see him first watch. I guess they played Stanley and Jim down this episode and Kevin and Creed kinda took their places.
Kevin = perfection! I laughed until I had tears streaming down my face. Brian is a dream to watch. So good!!!
Jim’s my favorite character. So i’m not ashamed to admit that without him The Office is no longer The Office. Therefore, Ultimatum was some strange situation in which Jim was kidnapped and held hostage in the warehouse while the rest of the gang were forced by threat to act out some bizarre and some humorous shenanigans WITHOUT any facial expressions made towards the camera. I don’t know how they did it. Just hope it never happens again.