The Office Calendar Giveaway #4

We’re still about two months away until the next new episode of ‘The Office.’

In the meantime, you don’t mind if OfficeTally runs a few more giveaways and other distractions, do you?

Didn’t think so. :)

Rainn Wilson Dennis Hopper

Okay, two words came to mind when I first looked at this photo: caption this.

Task: caption the photo above in 20 words or less. Your caption must be Office-related. Submit your caption in a comment below. I will personally choose the winner.

Prize: the winner will receive The Office DVD Wall Calendar. Yeah, I know we’re already two months into the new year. I’m a little late.

Restrictions: eligible entries must include a valid email address, and correct spelling, grammar, and punctuation. Duplicate entries will disqualify you. If you’ve won a calendar during a previous giveaway, you are disqualified as well. US and Canada only, please.

Deadline: submit your entries by Wednesday, Feb. 20th, 11pm PT.


  • kreidy: Dwight’s panty raid to Camden took a turn for the worse.
  • Fun_Run: OMG! Dwight Became a hooker!
  • Jana: Fashion show! Fashion show! Fashion show at lunch!

The photo is of a little sketch that Rainn did with Dennis Hopper for the Spirit Awards.


  1. As much as he tries, Dwight will never have the panache to wear women’s clothes quite like Michael did.

  2. Jim told me women live longer than men because they take more vitamin D. I intend to prove him wrong.

  3. This is why Chili’s has a policy about sneaking drinks off of other people’s tables.

  4. The OTHER interim job Dwight was forced to take to make ends meet before landing his job at Staples.

  5. This is traditional Amish garb worn by Schrute men, though, it does resemble the getup of a cross-dressing prostitute.

  6. Looks like Dennis Hopper took the slow train from Philly.

    (I feel so unoriginal, but it was the first thing that came to me!


  7. Smells pretty bad, doesn’t it?
    It’s called bull-crap. And a client can smell it from a mile away.

  8. To drum up business for the beet farm, Dwight was forced to come up with some “creative marketing strategies.”

  9. It is the duty of an undercover volunteer sheriff to not shed light on any more penises, lest his cover be blown.

  10. “The Staples job was a front. Dwight actually resorted to turning tricks for celebrities after resigning from Dunder-Mifflin.”

  11. Dwight Schrute shown here on another secret undercover mission as given to him by his contacts “Pim and Jam” from the CIA.

  12. Still from Threat Level: Midnight set. Pictured are Dwight Schrute as Catherine and Dennis (stand-in for Creed Bratton as villian).

  13. Pop quiz hotshot! You have to sell 50 reams of Dunder-Mifflin paper in one hour. How far would you go?

  14. Dwight Schrute: bound and determined to find the real mystery behind MISSterious’ summer collection.

  15. Question: What kind of tube top is best?

    False. Striped, mid-driff bearing tube top.


    Fact: The convertible is a RIDICULOUS choice for this climate.

  16. “It’s not that I don’t trust your methods, Mr. Booth, but are you sure this will help me get Angela back????”

  17. I’m thinking that next time you’re in the shower, you should check yourself out. You know, give yourself an exam. Those things are like ticking time bags.

  18. Dwight goes undercover to help Jack Bauer catch a terrorist (Unbeknownst to him, Dennis Hopper was only acting in “24”).

  19. This is what happens when the writers go on strike. I guess Angela really is the man in their relationship.

  20. If I have to do this, based on stereotypes that are totally untrue, you would maybe not be a very good driver.

  21. “Reject (Dwight dressed as) a woman and she will never let it go. One of the many defects of their kind. Also, weak arms.”

  22. I live by one rule: No cross dressing, no way. Very messy, inappropriate…no. But, I live by another rule: Just do it…Nike.

  23. Dwight shows that he will literally go to any lengths to meet the legendary Deacon.

    (You had to have seen Waterworld.)

  24. Dwight’s parents had lied; his twin wasn’t resorbed. Candi Schrute had survived and was currently working as a call girl.

  25. “Fact: When it’s not beet season, the Schrute’s have found side-jobs as courtesans to be both lucrative AND respectable.”

  26. Jim convinces Dwight Dennis Hopper is a spy for Staples and that to get the information Dunder Mifflin needs to crush Staples, Dwight must go undercover as a Sunset Strip prostitute to lure the evidence from Dennis.

  27. The tubetop belonged to Dwight’s grandmother. She was buried in it, so… family heirloom.

  28. Dwight’s determination to win the ‘Bushiest Beaver’ Dundie this year is taken to the extreme.

  29. What eventually happens to Dwight after peeing into a can on a sales call… if Meredith is driving.

  30. Look, Officer, what was I SUPPOSED to do to make ends meet during the Writer’s Strike?

  31. oops! Please disregard my last post —

    Jim convinces Dwight Dennis Hopper is Staples spy and that he must go undercover to recover company secrets from Dennis.

  32. The beet sales were falling so Dwight consulted the teenagers that hang out on his fields on how to make a buck in the modern world

  33. Dwight finally found someone who respected his volunteer deputy background. He also enjoyd Dwight a few other costumes…

  34. After the slump in beet sales and companies going paperless, Dwight got desperate, you should see what mose is doing.

  35. Dwight shows Michael what the world would be like if he had never been born, “It’s a Wonderful Life”-style.

  36. Due to the writer’s strike, Dwight did not receive his usual extra paycheck from the documentary crew. This is how he made ends meet.

  37. Busted!: Dwight’s long lost cousin, Dwightella, with Michael’s cousin on their third date together!
    Update!: No more office hookups allowed.

  38. As Dwight’s summer internship as a fudge packer at the Hershey Chocolate Factory comes to a close, he and his uncle celebrate.

  39. Dennis: Yeah, I gave him a ride home because … we’re dating.
    Rainn: Wow. There it is.

  40. The CIA actually did want Dwight for a secret mission. Crazy things can happen at ice cream socials.

  41. Am I particularly proud of the period between Dunder-Mifflin and Staples? No. But Schrute men are survivalists.

  42. Dwight didn’t expect Dennis Hopper to show up to drive him to the hospital when he started making Vietnam sounds.

  43. Has Michael gone too far this time? Making Dwight persuade a closeted Dennis Hopper to buy DM paper in bulk?

  44. “Officer! I was just taking my wife to the hospital . . . she’s gone into labor and it’s caused her to grow facial hair. Could you, uh . . . direct us to the hospital?!”

  45. Fact: Dwight was a volunteer sherriff’s deputy on the weekends.
    New Fact: Recently, he has found another venue for “public service.”

  46. Maybe we could go out for a beer sometime, and you could tell me… how you do that to another dude.

  47. Turns out that Dwight didn’t resorb his twin in the womb. And just look at what he’s up to…

  48. Excuse me, would you know which way to the Battlestar Galactica convention? He seemed to have left his costume.

  49. Dwight needed a job to pay off his medical bill from his visits to Dr. Crentist the Dentist.

  50. If I could menstruate, I wouldn’t have to deal with idiotic calendars anymore. I’d just be able to count down from my previous cycle. Plus, I’d be more in tune with the moon and the tides.

  51. Dwight will do anything to get a celebrity endorsement for Schrute Farms Bed and Breakfast.

  52. Jim and Pam’s next mission for Dwight was for him to be an undercover hooker. He went a little far..

  53. What’d I do? I did my job.

    Don’t believe in cocking people.


    Sorry, coddling. Got penises on the brain.

  54. Oh, no, I have a better one! Can I change mine?

    [from tanster: sure, but you’ll be disqualified. :) ]

  55. Dwight: I’m Dwight. I’m the dancer that was requested.

    Hopper: Okay. I specifically ordered a stripper.

    Dwight: I’m the stripper.

    Matt (I smell nice…like Tide)

    PS…you can see it in the picture but Michael is in the background cooking up man meat on his foreman grill.

  56. My girlfriend and I broke up recently. And I must say, I am relieved. Gives me a chance to sow my wild oats.

  57. What? The women in our office don’t know how to act like ladies; they proved that by writing that stuff about Michael in the “ladies room”. I am showing them how to act like civilized LADIES.

  58. After Angela dumped me, I… kinda stopped taking care of myself for a while, and… I hit bottom when, uh…

  59. Want old clients back?

    No need for enticement with technology or gift baskets.

    Just do business…the old-fashioned way.

  60. Meredith and Creed after driving into the fountain of youth. With the help of their built-in GPS.

  61. The best way to win Angela back is to win her dad over. And I’ll do what it takes….Jim! Get that camera away from here!

  62. Basing his reconnaissance work on stereotypes, Dwight goes undercover to spy on the San Francisco branch.

  63. Rainn: I’m the only one available tonight.
    Dennis: Eff. Alright, what’s the damage?

  64. “My name is Dwight K. Schrute, the man to my left is the owner of Dunder Mifflin’s #1 competitor, and I will do ANYTHING to bring him down and save our company. That however does not include anything having to do with betraying my best friend/boss/mentor Michael Gary Scott, or entering into a banded brotherhood with homosexual men.”

  65. With The Office shut down due to the writer’s strike, Rainn lost all sense of direction. His statement: “I’ve gotta earn a living somehow.”

  66. Dennis Hopper stayed at Schrute Farms recently. You do whatever it takes to get a good review in TripAdvisor.

  67. A tube top without a bra in a top-downed convertible is a ridiculous choice for Scranton’s climate in February.

  68. You may ask me out to dinner. Nothing fancy or foreign, no bars, no patios, no vegetables, and no seafood.

  69. Dwight Schrute makes a cameo appearance opposite Dennis Hopper in the new film “Agent Michael Scarn and the Overkill Killer.”

  70. Ruddy cheeks, thick calves, no tats, no moles. No tats. No… tats. Of course I want-

  71. The package from Future Dwight contained a note: “Burn all your clothes and put these on. Board the convertible arriving at the corner of Lackawanna and Adams Avenues.”

  72. Something weird is going on; What did Dennis say? The Dwight Schrute Story by Dwight Schrute with Dennis Hopper.

  73. “We are dedicated to providing you with the very best customer service–the very best personal business relationship we can, if you ever decide to come back to us. Please come back to us.”

  74. An Easy Rider and an uneasy rider return to Utica with an empty soda can and a variety of explosives.

  75. Here’s my card. It’s got my cell number, my pager number, my home number, and my other pag-…GAH!

  76. Pop quiz hot shot…what do you do when you can’t be a Lackawanna County volunteer sheriff’s deputy?

  77. Rainn: Does it smell like updog in here?
    Dennis: *looks to the camera confused* What’s up dog?

  78. Dwight: I am older. I am wiser. Do not mess with me.

  79. Look at what you have done, Angela. Dennis and I are heading to Oscar’s party. Enjoy the photo! –Dwight

  80. Dennis: That’s a nice top Rainn.
    Rainn: Thank you. My grandfather was buried in it.

  81. What? Yes, this IS our solution to success in an increasingly paperless world. And no, Dennis Hopper doesn’t know where he is right now.

  82. Yes, the Schrute family has a long, proud history of cross-dressing for the benefit of the human race. My great-great-grandfather, Cleophus Schrute, often wore a hoop skirt to help free slaves.

    He was shot and killed though…

  83. After the murder of Sprinkles and his break up with Angela, Dwight had to find an outlet for his pain. After similarly dealing with Pam in Stamford, Jim had suggested cross-dressing and riding in convertibles.

  84. Michael Scott director’s cut. Kelly: makeup. Oscar: costume design, obviously. Phyllis: celebrity wrangling.
    Dwight as Sue Grafton: crazy hot!

Comments are closed.