The Office: Doomsday, 8.06

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The Office: Doomsday

Writer: Daniel Chun, Director: Troy Miller

Summary (NBC): Dwight starts a system to find mistakes in the office — Dwight tries to help the office’s efficiency by installing a Doomsday device that will get them all fired if they make too many mistakes.

The Office Doomsday extras

The Office Doomsday rating

In a poll conducted November 3-7, 2011, Tallyheads rated this episode: 7.16/10

See all The Office Season 8 ratings.

The Office Doomsday quotes

Manually transcribed by tanster. :)

Stanley: Closing time, every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.

Andy: Who’s your favorite Iron Chef?

Dwight: As with all my dreams, I’m guessing it was about my fear of immigrants.

Robert: And you can’t have a favorite Iron Chef. It depends entirely on the secret ingredient. Sometimes I feel you don’t know food at all.

Val: Are you really this lazy?

Dwight: I should have used a shorter string.

Andy: You’re the deuce I never want to drop.

Andy: Go do the voodoo that you do so well.

Gabe: There was attraction in at least one direction.

Gabe: I don’t want a bunch of bureaucratic red tape wrapped around my jock.

Toby: Do you know her last name yet?

Toby: She’s going to be screaming her own last name?

Dwight: The Accountability Booster! Five strikes in a day equals a home run. One home run, and you’re out.

Dwight (reading Jim’s email): “Robert’s favorite song, Creep by TLC, Creep by Radiohead.”

Dwight (reading Oscar’s email): “There’s no way he hasn’t strangled at least one stripper.”

Dwight (reading Kelly’s email): “He eats his yogurt like he is punishing it for disappointing him. P.S. We should kill him.”

Kelly: You are a psycho who is ruining our lives.

Dwight: They’re making me out to be a Bond villain. I like to think of myself as a brilliant scientist who will stop at nothing to remake the world.

Gabe: I will be milking that hard.

Gabe: The Michelin Man called. He wants his cummerbund back.

Oscar: There’s only one computer that I trust, and it’s powered by Thai food and Spanish reds.

Dwight: How about “Scranton Strangler 666”?

Mindy: What’s Dwight’s mother’s name?
Jim: Hedda.

Gabe: Don’t bring me any of that caramel soy latte crap, okay? I want a decaf frappuccino.

Erin: You’re a real crumb bum, you know that?

Dwight: You can’t just change the rules because you don’t like the outcome.

Oscar: Dwight, be human for once? Shut down the machine?

Dwight: Good luck finding a new job, idiots.

Andy: Your breasts are enormous. That could help us.

Erin: He’s at some club where you either eat squash or play squash.
Jim: I’ll try both.

Dwight: What does it look like I’m doing? Digging a grave for a horse.

Dwight: If you hit another horse, you’ve dug too far.

Pam: Oh wow. I forgot how pretty your house is.

Darryl: When are they going to do a labradoodle that’s just lab?

Angela: Where were you two hours ago, Beautiful Mind?

Pam: Pobody’s nerfect, right?
Dwight: Did you just have a stroke, Pam?

Pam: You know what would go so great with this cabbage pie? Milk.

Dwight: Sive drafely.

Robert: Do you find one-day only Jet Blue sales to Buffalo interesting?

Dwight: I’m going to have to work with them forever, aren’t I?

Icon provided by pessimistreader.


  1. Wow! I think that this would make a great season (or series) finale, but where is it going to go here as the sixth episode?! Is anyone’s desk going to be seating an unfamiliar face soon?

  2. OMG Classic Dwight! Reminds me of the “Stress” episode & yes I think they are going to add a new cast member. Does anyone know if they will EVER do a michael wedding? That would ice the cake for me!

  3. Anyone see the promo? Any chance that someone could actually get fired, even just for a few episodes and then come back (eg. The Return?)

  4. I’m thinking Dwight’s own name comes up in that envelope and his past sales numbers keep him from being fired. Then Jim can reveal in a talking head that he planted it as a prank. It will be Season 2’s “Halloween” all over again, and the person who should be fired finagles his/her way around it and the person who actually is fired is somebody we never hear from, like Nate. At least, that’s my guess.

  5. Not the best episode of this season so far, but definitely better than Spooked and Lotto

    so far, it’s
    The Incentive, Garden Party, The List, Doomsday, Spooked, Lotto

    but robert california! “and you can’t have a favorite iron chef, it’s all about the secret ingredient! honestly, sometimes i feel like you don’t know food at all..”

  6. Fantastic episode tonight. The two little subplots with Gabe and Jim/Robert were hilarious (the main storyline with the doomsday device was very well paced and executed too). Office writers and producers, if you’re reading this, please have the writer for this episode write much more for the show!!!! (tanster, you should pass this on to them seeing as how you have connections)

    I haven’t laughed so much at an Office episode since the fifth season.

  7. I still don’t believe that the whole office would take the whole Doomsday device so seriously but aside from that, I really enjoyed the episode. It was really interesting to see Dwight’s emotional side and his soft spot for Pam and I guess the writers are really gradually dwelling into the different sides of the characters like they said they would. The safety training side plot in the warehouse was also a good idea but there was too much Gabe. Also, I love 90s music and the Closing Time cold open was my favorite cold open in a long while and it was believable: Andy loves to sing and Stanley loves closing time. Perfect. 8/10

  8. The show has lost its roots and tonight it was hard to tell this was the office still. Kevin’s complete character change and the bland episode makes me hope that this is the last season. How the mighty have fallen.

  9. it was ‘meh’ for me. preferred pretty much every other episode of the season except lotto

  10. I loved Erin’s screaming when they make the fifth mistake; Ellie Kemper is fantastic. I would have liked to have seen a little more of the safety training in the warehouse, but oh, well. Pobody’s nerfect. :)

  11. Best episode of the season so far, everything worked, I loved how Dwight despite being Dwight actually cares for his co workers. In fact I would go as far to say, it’s a top 20 episode ever.

  12. Anyone else wonder why Andy didn’t just threaten to fire Dwight? That irked me a bit, but otherwise it was a funny episode. My favorite parts were when Erin and Kelly were yelling at Dwight and when Stanley sung “Closing Time.”

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