W: Charlie Grandy, D: Seth Gordon
Summary (NBC): Jim and Pam are out of excuses so they have no choice but to go out with Michael and Helene (guest star Linda Purl). Meanwhile, Dwight is strangely doing nice things for everyone in the office.
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Dwight: Don’t mention it. You owe me one. You all owe me one.
Dwight: Fish sticks are not an aphrodisiac. You’re thinking of deer penis.
Dwight: Jeez. When did everyone get so cynical?
Dwight: That’s right. You’re a woman and you need to refuse food the first time.
Pam: No way out. No way out.
Ryan: I’ve always found beauty in uncommon places.
Michael: There’s no better medicine than birthday lunch.
Michael: So open wide, Pam, and take a big ol’ spoonful of birthday lunch medicine. Take with food.
Michael: The rest of the story has been censored due to inappropriosity.
Creed: Something’s up. That paper was never supposed to arrive.
Michael: Just want you to succeed, Pammy.
Pam: I have a whistle in my purse. I didn’t even blow it.
Andy: Do not test my politeness.
Dwight: If you clench your buttocks together while walking, you can really take the pressure off your knees.
Jim: Oooh, burn. Burn on you. And a little bit on me, too.
Michael: I am not robbing the cradle. If anything, I am robbing the grave.
Michael: Do I really want to go snowboarding? No. But I would like to if I wanted to.
Jim: Is that Shel Silverstein?
Pam: Home run, MIchael.
Jim: You set the bar so high.
Michael: That was a bunt.
Pam: Okay, weirdo. C’mon, it’s time for cake.
Michael: I want you to enjoy that cake because I have something terrible I need to tell you.
Michael: I want you to enjoy your cake before I tell you this terrible, terrible thing.
Michael: Who is Kafka Esque? I don’t know him.
Michael: There’s another woman, and her name is Italy. And skydiving. And bungee jumping.
Michael: I want kids. And you, unfortunately, have already completed that part of your journey down there.
Andy: What if Dwight dies and I still owe him something? That is a recipe for a ghost.
Dwight: They’re mushrooms. They don’t get that high.
Pam: I have the worst attitude of any person here.
Michael: Talk to me, face. Tell me what Pam’s brain is thinking.
Pam: I’m going to hit you as hard as I can.
Kelly: Pam. She’s going to punch the crap out of your face after work.
Kelly: Pam has that crazy pregnancy strength right now.
Toby: The power comes from the back foot.
Meredith: He’s not in the men’s room, although the seat was warm, so we may have just missed him.
Kevin: Why can’t you just agree with me sometimes?
Michael: I’m scared I’m going to love it.
Pam: Don’t ever date a member of my family again.
Michael: For the record, your mom came on to me.
Dwight: Why are you limping?
Dwight: Let’s get some raw meat on that face. I’ve got a chicken in the freezer upstairs.
Michael: I have a hover car and a hover house. And my wife is a runner. And it shows.
In a poll conducted November 5-9, Tallyheads rated this episode: 7.47/10