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Writer: Allison Silverman, Director: Matt Sohn
Summary (NBC): Pam trains a temp to take her place while she is on maternity leave — pregnant Pam recruits Dwight to prove that Jim finds the office’s pretty new temp (guest star Lindsey Broad) attractive. Meanwhile, Robert California shocks Andy, Darryl, and Kevin when he asks to join their band.
The Office Pam’s Replacement extras
The Office Pam’s Replacement rating
In a poll conducted November 10-14, 2011, Tallyheads rated this episode: 7.72/10
See all The Office Season 8 ratings.
The Office Pam’s Replacement quotes
Erin: Your mother is dead. She’s dead. She was hit by a bus.
Dwight: Andy, I’m really sorry about your mother. My deepest condolences.
Pam: I make sounds much worse than this.
Pam: But yeah. I’m pregnant.
Andy: It’s like a porno — hey, did anyone order a pizza?
Gabe: That’s the best way to land a hot girlfriend. You get her hooked on blow.
Toby: You know who’s gorgeous? Helen Mirren.
Dwight: Helen Mirren was born Helen Mironoff. That’s right, you’re fake salivating over a Soviet-era Russian.
Val: Not bad, fellas. You’re better than you look!
Kevin: We’re called Kevin and the Zits.
Robert: Tambourine? You know I’m the CEO, right?
Kevin: Guys! Robert is going to be a Zit!
Pam: Objectively, do you find her attractive?
Jim: It’s true, but it doesn’t help anybody.
Pam: Even I want some fries with that shake.
Dwight: Her breasts are large, her waist is small, her reproductive health in ample evidence, and facial symmetry — come on.
Pam: I know it sounds nuts, but I think Dwight is the only who’s telling me the truth.
Dwight: Well now, obviously, you’re at an all-time low.
Pam: Yup, that’s the Dwight I need.
Dwight: Our only loyalty is to the truth.
Dwight: Rule 3: Don’t fall in love.
Kelly: You don’t want to end up like Elin Nordegren. Actually, what am I saying, you wish you had her life. No offense, Pam.
Kevin: Maybe we should warm up with some scales?
Robert: Midnight Rambler?
Jim: Oh, you know who might be good? Mike Tibbets.
Dwight: I don’t see what’s so ugly about him. He’s got the broad face of a brewer.
Pam: Jim picked someone just unattractive enough to shut me up without tipping it.
Dwight: Just ugly enough to have deniability.
Dwight: I say we start there.
Pam and Kelly: With the crotch?
Dwight: With the crotch.
Creed: How did I get this long triangle?
Dwight: Jim has no discernible sense of humor, Pam, you should know that.
Pam: Why is he making her laugh so much?
Dwight: I’m sorry, I fell down, Mr. Balance.
Dwight: Does your husband have very soft erections? Because if not, I just grabbed a very soft penis for nothing.
Cathy: Oh, that line from Zoolander? It was from a deleted scene so we were both right.
Jim: Told ya.
Andy: Did you know that Lisa toured with Chaka Khan?
Kevin: You serious? From Star Trek?
Andy: We go where the music takes us.
Val: I think the music left without you.
Dwight: Why don’t you check out the sympathy cards, old man?
Dwight: Is your name Jim Halpert?
Jim: In my defense, he was grabbing my crotch fairly aggressively at the time.
Dwight: It’s important to go every month and get your prostate checked.
Dwight: Doesn’t it worry you in the slightest that Jim is not his real name?
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