The Office: Money, 4.07-08

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The Office

Writer: Paul Lieberstein, Director: Paul Lieberstein

Summary (NBC): As Jan renovates the condo, Michael confronts his growing debt every way he can. Pam and Jim spend a night out on Dwight’s family farm. One-hour episode.

The Office Money extras

The Office Money rating

8.56/10

See all The Office Season 4 ratings.

The Office Money quotes

Michael: Steak! Where’s my steak!

Michael: Meryl Streep is the bad guy.

Pam: He’s watching Million Dollar Baby. He’s gonna try to kill me.

Jan: It costs what it costs.

Michael: At the end of my life, when I’m sitting on my yacht, am I gonna be thinking about how much money I have? No, I’m going to be thinking about how many friends I have, and my children, and my comedy albums. I mean, I have a yacht, so I obviously did pretty well money-wise.

Jan: Conniving little runt, put him through.

Dwight: Schrute Farms. Guttentag.

Dwight: We make our own mattresses that don’t conform to the traditional sizes. Closest would be twin.

Jim: Does the Department of Health know about this?
Dwight: I am not telling you anything. Permits are pending.

Jan: Why don’t you just pretend that you have a car?

Dwight: I was recently scrubbing my room of memories and I didn’t see it there.

Dwight: I don’t care. They’re your oats.

Michael: You wouldn’t understand. It’s a secret.
Jim: I wouldn’t understand, or it’s a secret?
Pam: You wouldn’t understand, Jim. It’s a secret.

Michael: It won’t be that fast, but it will be that easy.

Pam: The Beets Motel. The Embassy Beets. Radish Inn.

Michael: I took this second job kind of as a hobby.

Dwight: We have three rooms, each with a different theme.
Pam: What are the themes?
Dwight: America, irrigation, and night time.

Jim: We will be requiring a bedtime story.
Dwight: No.
Jim: Not even Harry Potter?

Dwight: As of this morning, we are completely wireless here at Schrute Farms. But as soon as I find out where Mose hid all the wires, we’ll get that power back on.

Michael: These meetings are useless.

Jim: Mmm, I’d say one in six.
Pam: What?
Jim: Oh, I thought you asked me what our chances were of being murdered here tonight.

Jim: I always imagined less manure. I mean, some manure. Just … less.

Michael: I wonder what I would’ve been back home.

Michael: Medical school must have cost like $40 or a donkey or something.

Michael: I would have been chief of surgery. Or a cowboy.

Pam: What century is this?

Dwight: I am better than you have ever been or ever will be.

Ryan: Hey guys! What’s happening? How’s my favorite branch doing?

Michael: Power point, power point, power point.

Michael: And up comes the tool bar. That’s what she said.

Michael: “Estimated time, 12 minutes.” So this should take about five or ten minutes.

Michael: What I do between 5:30pm and 1am is nobody’s business but mine and my other businesses.

Jim: Are you a cocktail waitress?

Kelly: Ryan used me as an object.

Michael: No one asked you anything ever, so whomever’s name is Toby, why don’t you take a letter opener and stick it in your skull.

Telemarketing boss: Come back anytime. Don’t forget to disinfect your headset.

Michael: The good thing about the American Dream is that you can just go to sleep, and try it all again the next night.

Andy: I have moonwalked past accounting, like, ten times.

Andy: Maybe you should look in the smart part of your brain.

Pam: Now that I think about it, Angela and Andy might actually make a good couple. But I couldn’t do that to Dwight. Or Angela. Or Andy.

Michael: Do you have any tips or ideas about sure things?

Michael: Do you know anybody in the mob?

Michael: Monkey problems. No, I’m not having monkey problems.

Michael: Maybe I am having an affair with Suzanne Somers.

Michael: I don’t talk to my girlfriend about money. It is rude and unsexual.

Darryl: You need to access your uncrazy side.

Kelly: I mean, who says exactly what they’re thinking. What kind of game is that.

Creed: Nobody just picks up “Get out of jail free” cards. Those things cost thousands.

Creed: Bankruptcy, Michael, is nature’s do-over.

Michael: I’ve always wanted to be in the witness protection program.

Michael: I’m a shipping merchant who raises fancy dogs. That’s the life.

Michael: I didn’t say it; I declared it.

Andy: I got game.

Michael: That is so cool how you have my name at the top.

Pam: “Table-making never seemed so possible.”

Oscar: Due to Michael’s clever financial maneuvering, he finds himself tremendously in debt.

Angela: Nothing fancy or foreign. No bars, no patios, no vegetables. And no seafood.

Jim: Did I ever tell you why I left Scranton? Yeah, I didn’t think I had. Well, it was all about Pam. Yeah, I mean, she was with Roy, and I just couldn’t take it. I mean, I lost it, Dwight. I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t concentrate on anything. And then weird stuff, like, food had no taste. So my solution was to move away. It was awful. And it is something that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. And that includes you.

Pam: Jim’s just really passionate about Italian food.

Jim: Yep, I’m very passionate about Italian food. In fact, um, I’m in love with Italian food.

Michael: A guy on a train with no answers. I hope that can be enough for you.

Jan: You were there for me. By my side. Without even a thought.

Michael: Don’t sell your implants, please.

Icon courtesy of callmelydia.

499 comments

  1. aww I hate to say I didn’t like it. A lot of the humor seemed very forced, especially that “whomever/whoever” bit in the conference room.
    I also feel like the camera crew is getting more and more intrusive. I never thought I’d see Jim and Pam cuddling in bed…and I kind of wish it stayed that way. It just seems really out of character for them to be so affectionate in front of both the camera AND dwight?!
    I’m really hopeful for the return of 1/2 hour, in-the-office Office next week!

  2. Creed saying that he transfers his debt to William Charles Schneider was priceless! That is Creed Bratton’s real name.

  3. Aww, good episode so far. Jim and Pam in bed, really cute.

    Michael taking the bus, and running after Jan blames him for being broke? Sad.

    I love Steve Carell. You always feel sorry for Michael.

  4. hahaha, Ryan used me as an object.

    Poor Dwight, and Michael. It’s so sad, the pathetic sad, not the sad sad.

    love this!!!!

  5. best episode ever…so far anyway. i seriously love mose, he is like the coolest thing ever. plus i really want to hit jan

  6. I loved seeing Jim and Pam snuggling together for the bedtime story. And the twin beds had been pushed together!

  7. Jim and pam. Made me cry.
    They are so cute.
    Jim is in love with italian food. Thats all he had to say.

    I can’t get over them. The kiss was so cute.
    I’m babbling.
    But that speech that Jim gave Dwight was the sweetest thing i’ve ever seen.

  8. Was that the guy who played Torgo in Manos the Hands of Fate (a horrible old movie that was spoofed on MST 3K) in the Money episode tonight???

  9. Dwight and Jim, followed by Jim and Pam, followed by Michael and Jan.

    AWESOME. The last 5 minutes.

    Was crying during the Dwight/Jim scene. totally awesome.

    Next week, thirty minutes, thank God, these episodes were a bit long.

  10. This was the most emotional episode of the Office. Yes, there were a lot of very funny parts, but it had a LOT of heart. This will always be one of my favorite episodes, and meant a lot to me personally…I was able to identify with MANY of the characters. Way to go, Office!

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