The Office: Tallahassee, 8.15

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The Office: Tallahassee Dwight Schrute Nellie Bertram

Writer: Daniel Chun, Director: Matt Sohn

Summary (NBC): After Dwight and his team arrive in Tallahassee, Dwight competes with his Dunder Mifflin coworkers to impress Sabre special projects president, Nellie Bertram (Catherine Tate). Back in Scranton, Andy avoids being manager when several people in the office demand raises. Guest star: Catherine Tate.

The Office Tallahassee extras

The Office Tallahassee rating

In a poll conducted February 16-20, 2012, Tallyheads rated this episode: 8.47/10

See all The Office Season 8 ratings.

The Office Tallahassee quotes

Manually transcribed by tanster :)

Erin: I was reading the mattress tag and I fell asleep.

Erin: Stanley, wake up, it’s Pretzel Day!

Dwight: I gotta find Luwanda at The Alcohol Club.

Dwight: When I first met Pam, she said something that slightly rubbed me the wrong way. Since then, I’ve loved working with Pam, and she’s frankly wonderful, but I hate her.

Dwight: Okay, Twiggy, that’s enough, get in the car.

Erin: Who says none of us are diarrheal?

Dwight: I’m gonna set your face on fire.

Jim: Woah, Stanley. Did you just come back from burning down a rival nightclub?

Stanley: Wanna get in? You can work the iPod.

Jim: Loggins and Messina.
Stanley: Did I say Messina?

Creed: It’s so peaceful, I’ve already written like 12 plays today.

Meredith: Hey, can you pick up the pin? Some of us like to work in our bare feet.

Kelly: Will one of you get the phone? I am freaking out. I know it’s for me.

Stanley: Life is short. “Drive fast and leave a sexy corpse.” That’s one of my mottos.

Packer: Quick query, Halpert. Still queer?

Packer: You can’t put me down. Too strong.

Nellie: Stop looking at my breasts, and start looking at my penis.

Nellie: I went on a shopping spree. Very destructive, I bought 13 pianos.

Nellie: It has to be winter, and I reject it.

Dwight: What is the antidote?
Jim: True love’s kiss.

Dwight: Right Dwight, Right Dwight. Sorry, now you’ll never be able to get that out of your head.

Dwight: It can’t be appendicitis. I eat more than enough bacon.

Dwight: I’m a decent baiter. My cousin Mose, that’s a master baiter.

Stanley: I’m not bored. I’m a pirate.

Jim: I’ve spent so much of my life telling myself, “please, don’t end up like Stanley.” And now I’m wondering, if I even have what it takes.

Nellie: Humans… pyramid. Human pyramid.

Packer: Dude, don’t you yak on me. This shirt’s Van Heusen.

Jim: The one thing Pam made sure I knew, Florida’s pretty loose with the death penalty.

Ryan: Who called it? Nothing but net.

Dwight: Don’t remember me like this. Remember me as the man who pulled down the screen.

Dwight: Philip, if you’re hearing this memo, that can only mean one thing. I’m dead. You are the rightful heir to Schrute Farms. Please, you must do one thing. Kill Mose before he kills you. Mose, hey, it’s Dwight. Listen, I just want to give you a heads up.

Dwight: You guys sound just like the enemies of Seabiscuit.

Dwight: Consumers are mindless lemmings. They just want to be told what to do.

Dwight: The menstrual cycle determines every choice a woman makes.

Nellie: What are the three pillars of retail?
Erin: Convenience.
Dwight: Ingredients.
Erin: Service.
Dwight: Burgers.
Erin: Building loyalty.
Dwight: Killing royalty.

Dwight: You know what is important? Is Dwight’s pillars. And there is only one. Desire.

Darryl: I know you want reception today, but tomorrow you won’t want to do her. She’s a dog.

Dwight: Just lost four ounces of appendix. Already replaced it with muscle.

Nellie: I give you Wally Amos, founder of Famous Amos Cookies!

Famous: Is it oatmeal with no raisins?
Erin: I’m sorry I wasted your time.

Icon provided by pessimistreader.


  1. sounds pretty great!!

    although I think they’ve milked the “Andy has a boss-related problem” episode pretty heavily, this has potential to do pretty well

    but I’m not looking forward to Catherine Tate…not funny. at all.

  2. I’m so excited Catherine Tate is back! They didn’t use her to her potential last time, so I hope we get to see some of it here. I absolutely love her on Doctor Who and her show, the Catherine Tate Show is amazing and hilarious.

  3. I’ve never been a fan of 1/2 the ofice being away. I agree enough with Andy as an incompetent manager.

  4. Agreed about Catherine Tate not being funny. I really hope this is just a one-episode stint for her…

  5. Catherine Tate is one of my favorite people in the world. I think if more people saw her on Doctor Who, they would love her as much as I do. She is an amazing and talented person. Can’t wait to see what she brings to the show… I mean, does it get stranger than Robert California? :)

  6. Andy avoids being manager when several people in the office demand raises…Is he going to determine who gets a raise by putting beans on their pictures?

  7. Catherine Tate is hilarious! Give her a chance, and check out The Catherine Tate Show which ran from 2004 – 2009. I agree with Anne, that Tate was not used to her potential in her The Office appearance. If the writers really do their job, then she will deliver lots of funny.

  8. Catherine Tate was NOT funny in Search Committee, but I’m all for Dwight-centric episodes, so I guess it all evens out. Anyone know if this could lead to Jo’s return? As I understand, she’s still with Sabre as Chairwoman of the Board.

  9. LOVE Catherine Tate, she’s the best hope to save The Office this season. She’s got that ability to be very funny and can make you cry as well. Can’t wait for her to arrive!

  10. I can’t stand CT from what I have seen in her own show, but I guess I can give her another chance here as long as she doesn’t hang around.
    I feel like the last thing this show needs is yet more characters competing for camera time. As for female characters, Pam will be back, and Erin and Angela have developed to where they have shown they can play a more central role – I wish they would use them all more instead, as it is we don’t see enough of them. Pam barely did anything before she left.

    I’m really glad that this season they didn’t go ahead with plans for Jordan, the new accountant guy, Stanley’s daughter(???!), and Poochie to all join the cast. Less is more.

  11. @16: I agree, but at the same time, I am a fan of anything that gives Stanley more screen time, and his daughter was supposed to do that. Does anyone know if that story hasn’t officially been given up?

  12. I’m excited to see Catherine Tate again. I thought she was a lot funnier in Search Committee than people gave her credit for.
    But it says that Dwight’s trying to compete with other people to impress her?
    I hope this isn’t another “everyone try to impress the boss” kind of situation…

  13. I have only seen Catherine Tate on the finale and I did not find her funny. Hopefully this episode will show her potential that most of her fans talk about. Overall, I’m excited for the episode! :)

  14. @10: You have no idea how bad I want Jo back on the show . Please bring her back NBC!

  15. Tonight is CLASSIC. I am loving everything about it. Dwight’s thinking Jim poisoned him is so funny.

  16. oh my god, that was an amazing episode!! the office is back to where it rightfully belongs, a strong arc with solid characters! loving the second half of this season

  17. This episode was the first in a long time that simply left me wanting more! I swear, this Tallhassee story line has really drawn me back in. I honestly wanted another half hour. Great episode. Like someone else said, strong story arc, solid characters. It’s fantastic.

  18. I must say, that even though I still find The Office enjoyable, I haven’t really found it funny this season.

    Until now.

    This episode really made me laugh :P

    The secondary story in Scranton was kind of bland but the Tallahassee story was perfect from start to finish.

  19. Best ep of the season. Multiple laughs out loud, plus one of the best cold opens ever. If they keep this up they can for sure go another full season after this one (at least). Seriously….I can’t say enough great things about this episode. I loved it.

  20. Another very good episode! Solid writing, Dwight was great again, Catherine Tate did a good job as well. Florida Stanley is pretty entertaining I must say. The only thing I didn’t get was why there was no storyline with Andy avoiding everyone because of them wanting raises. I didn’t miss that storyline, just wondering why it was in the synopsis yet it didn’t happen…


    The cold opening was hilarious!

  21. Best ep of the season. Multiple laughs out loud, plus one of the best cold opens ever. If they keep this up they can for sure go another full season after this one (at least). Seriously….I can’t say enough great things about this episode. I loved it.

  22. I was quite uneasy about this storyline when I first heard about it, but I am loving this! The episodes are getting better and better every week. Keep it up ‘Office’! :D

  23. This episode was wonderful. There were so many moments of just pure hilariousness. The “murder” scene at the beginning reminded me of the season 2 episode “Conflict Resolution” when Dwight complained that Jim had put a bloody glove in his desk and he thought he was the “real” murderer. Catherine Tate was perfect, and it was (dare I say it) nice to see Packer back. Also, I like Ryan without Kelly. He’s enjoyable.

    I really liked the Andy sub-plot too. It was funny and nice, but wasn’t ridiculously over done and had just the right omph to it. I have a feeling originally they were going to have Andy dodging the office people for raises, but cut it because of the negative press Andy’s character was getting.

    All-time favorite line, however, was Creed’s “It’s so quiet I’ve written, like, 12 plays…” Awesome.


    – – I can’t remember laughing that hard. Literally, I was on the floor, gasping for air with my stomach aching. It was grand.

  25. Honestly I feel like it was the best episode out of the past couple of seasons. Very, very impressed.

  26. Am I the only one who doesn’t like Catherine Tate? I didn’t like James Spader either. I miss good ol’ Jim and Pam happiness.

  27. Excellent episode!!!!! Very impressive!!!!! I loved to see funny scenes with Dwight making a fool out of himself with his presentation despite he’s with an IV. Of course, Jim didn’t poison him. The return of Packer was awesome, he hasn’t been seen on the show for a year, since this episode with his name on it (“Todd Packer”). The scenes with Andy replacing Erin were amazing, too; specially when Pam and Darryl speak to him heart to heart, in order to tell him to stop playing the receptionist, even when he misses Erin. Nellie Bertram’s introduction was funny, too, specially with the “penis” speech. I like the new Stanley, he’s so great.

  28. I really think this episode captured the best of the Office. I think the best ones revolve around Dwight, Jim, and Pam. I LOL’ed so many times during this episode. And how cute was it that Andy loved reception? I thought that was hilarious when he was so happy to go get the phone during his talking head.
    These last three episodes have really been top notch. I think it’s partly because they didn’t have Robert in them. He’s just not funny. More Dwight! (and JAM)

  29. The Office has not been this good since season 3. This has been quite the impressive string of episodes. I had seriously given up on the show after the Gettysburg episode, but after ‘Pool Party’ I’ve been hooked. The cold open tonight was one of the best in the show’s history, if not the best ever! This Tallahassee storyline is just the shot in the arm this show needed. Hope the great episodes continue.

  30. After a rough start to the season, the show has done much better the past few weeks. I like the little cliff hangers the writers have at the end of each episode. We still haven’t got much out of the Angela’s baby yet and what Cathy was talking about on the phone last week. Eventually, in 1 episode, it’s all going to spill!

  31. I thought it was a rather good episode, but much too underwhelming when compared to the past few episodes. “Jury Duty” and “Special Project” are easily the best episodes this entire season, and it’s good that they’re back-to-back. But that’s the thing; it seems like it alternates between good episodes and average episodes. Cold open was very funny, but not enough laughs after that.

  32. some portions felt so over the top but overall it was an ok episode. excellent cold open

  33. When the show revolves around MR schrute and jim. It’s great. Andy being the main character really brought all those episodes down. He is like eggnog you enjoy it but not in large doses. Best cold open since season 5!!

  34. love, love LOVE it! This was the first Thursday in so long that I spent anxiously waiting for the show to start. Brilliant cold opening, Dwight was deranged and hilarious, Catherine Tate was great…I have to say I think she would have been much better than Robert California as manager. I’m literally biting my nails waiting for next week. Whatever the writers have done to get their groove back, I hope it lasts!

  35. I’m callin it now…Tallahassee will be the second best story line ever (right after Michael Scott paper company)

  36. Wonderful! The best episode in years! the cold open was prob in the top 5 all time…can´t remember enjoying an episode this much for the entire 30 min, even the ending with the cookie talk was hilarious! Love it!

  37. This show just keeps on getting better each week! The cold open was flat out hilarious. Everyone got some great lines and I like how they set Andy up as the receptionist for the ending. When Andy’s not used in major doses, it’s really effective. Personally, I don’t think they need Spader. Todd Packer had some great lines and I was pleasantly surprised by Catherine Tate.

  38. Well, since Dwight called him, it looks like Mose now knows how to use a phone! (Lecture Circuit reference) If Mose has been taught how to use a phone, could someone teaching him sex be next?

  39. Another great episode and definitely one of the best cold opens ever. Didn’t hate Catherine Tate’s character as much as I thought I would. In fact, I’ll go as far as saying, I like her quite a bit more than James Spader at this point. Glad they’ve let go the Andy Boss Issues for a while…

  40. Given that we’ve already seen that the UK Office and the US Office are in the same universe, I wonder if we’ll have the Tallahassee crew run into Lee (Dawn’s ex)?

  41. Oh my god – that may just have been the BEST Jim prank ever!!!!!!!!!!

    What a wonderful, hilarious episode!!

  42. #46 Brian, Andy isn’t eggnog; He is more of a Nog-a-sake!

    Liked the episode. 8/10

  43. Good episode, but boy I can’t stand Nellie Bertram and Todd Packer; they are like the female and male twins of the same obnoxious character! The cold opening was great and I loved Stanley and Erin in this one.

  44. Wow! This episode was great! Loving how things have been in these past few weeks! And I was wrong about Catherine Tate not being a good fit, but she was hilarious. This episode was one of the best. It blew my mind.

  45. So reading the synopsis again… did I black out during the part “when several people in the office demand raises” ???

  46. I haven’t laughed that hard at an Office episode since The Injury, and that’s like the highest praise I could ever give. I’m a little blown away right now, I definitely didn’t see that coming.

  47. Hands down best cold-open from the past few seasons. Erin and Dwight have such an amazing dynamic.

  48. I really enjoyed this episode. I thought at first that Erin sleeping upside-down was a reference to Pippi Longstocking, who sleeps exactly the same way. And I forgot that we already learned that Mose now knows how to work a phone when Dwight called him when he was named acting manager.

    And who else feels sorry for the hotel maid who had to clean up Jim’s prank?

  49. Ok, I changed my mind about Catherine Tate. She was quite entertaining in this episode. Stanley was awesome, it was good to see him get more than just a line an episode and see his character fleshed out. I hope that the other characters that we don’t hear from as often get a chance to shine as well. Andy was given the right amount of lines again, and as the season goes on he is settling into the manager’s role nicely. His turn as receptionist was very “Andy” and didn’t feel like Michael lite at all. In some eps it felt like they were just giving MS’s lines to Andy, which didn’t feel genuine, but this one was the right fit. Dwight was great as usual, maybe next week we see some dwangela action. My only quibbles: why Erin the receptionist, Ryan and Kathy the temp (why is she still there)went on the trip, rather than the sales team? It would make more sense if they had hired another salesperson to replace Andy, and that person attended. Also, not enough Pam.

  50. This episode was great! At the cold open, even my parents — who hate hate hate the office — could not stop laughing. It looks like the show is starting to figure out what it needs to make it great again.

  51. Loved Catherine Tate. I laughed so hard at the “13 pianos” line. Dwight is so funny when paired with one of the ladies, and I’m glad Andy was dialed down a bit. Hope this is a good sign of what’s to come! Oh yeah, totally missed the people asking for raises too. Gonna head to Hulu and see if I catch it after a second viewing.

  52. Probably one of my favorite Office cold opens. Catherine Tate wasn’t as terrible as last year, but she still wasn’t funny. I’d also like to know why the Scranton plotline was different than it is in the plot summary, although the reception thing was probably the better plot. Dwight’s lines as he is on the stretcher still have me laughing. I was convinced this was written by BJ Novak or Paul Lieberstein, but no – a writer who has only been around since S6.

  53. What a great cold open. I could have fell out on the floor myself! I like to see Dwight & Erin team up, they are good together. Also glad to see the Pack Attack back. Like RobCal, the jury is still out on Nellie for me. In addition to Danny Cordray & Kathy What’s Her Face, Nellie seems to be an extraneous character.

    This episode definitely got that disconcerting discomfort feeling going for me. I’m not sure if it will be the Office kind of weird (yea) or an off kind of weird (nay). I will have to see the story lines play out a little more. However when I heard the closing music I was like “What the. That’s it.” The end really snuck up on me. Must have been a good show to have gone by so fast, time flies when you’re having fun.

  54. I just have to say in the spirit of the reality of this “reality” show that this Sabre Pyramid thing looks like the epitome of planned obsolescence. Doesn’t seem like a good economic climate to be opening a chain of stores around such a product, but hey that’s just me.

  55. I’ve reconsidered my rating of this episode, and now realize that I don’t think I’d seen the entire episode. The first five minutes including the cold open were brilliant. Also the Catherine Tate speech was funny occasionally. We’ve had three great episodes in a row, and this season has much more hope now.

  56. @Jim and Pam Fan:

    I completely agree. 3 hilarious episodes, they are on a roll! So happy with the direction the show is going!! Can’t wait for more!

  57. PhillyInDC – THANK YOU SO FREAKING MUCH. I’ve been going CRAZY trying to figure out where I knew her from. It’s Trish Suhr from Clean House. I could hear her voice and see her animated face, but I just COULDN’T place where I’d seen it before. Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!!

  58. Two very good episodes in a row! I was just about to stop watching “The Office” for good, and then this happened.

    I hope that Cathy puts the moves on Jim soon. It would be interesting to see some real crisis in P&J’s relationship.

  59. I also liked the interaction with Dwight and Erin acting as his kind of assistant. It works well and sort of makes up for not having the Michael and Erin moments anymore.

    It also makes me still think that Dwight probably should have been the choice for manager. Episodes like this show that he could do it, and was maybe better suited to the role than Andy. I often think Andy was better out with the others than stuck away in the manager’s office.

  60. Earlier I had commented on how fast I thought this episode had gone by without me even noticing it until the very end. How it made me think, “What the. That’s it.” The end really snuck up on me. I realize now that I missed a prime opportunity (or two) for a “That’s what she said” joke. I feel like Michael did when he finally got Dwight to ask him, “What’s updog?” =/

  61. Fun fact about this episode. When the phone was ringing and neither Pam or Andy would answer the whole office started yelling to answer the phone… Including Stanley!

    Wasn’t he supposed to be in Florida burning down a rival night club??

  62. Tallahassee was one of the best if not the best episodes of S-8.

    Dwight quickly correcting himself (“Fast forward to today…” during his left-the-hospital presentation was one of the funniest moments of this series, ever.

    I haven’t watched S-8 enough to absorb its shows as much as S-1 through S-4 but my impression has always been “Liked the early shows. Loved much of the middle eight. Felt a little disappointed by the rest.”

    Still…it was wonderful to see so much focus on everyone not named Michael Scott. S-8 and S-9 have a number of detractors; I ain’t one of ‘em.

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